Back April in Spain
Chapters (61)
  1. Landing Page
  2. APRIL IN SPAIN
  3. Dedication
  4. Contents
  5. LONDON
  6. Chapter 1
  7. DONOSTIA
  8. Chapter 2
  9. Chapter 3
  10. Chapter 4
  11. Chapter 5
  12. Chapter 6
  13. Chapter 7
  14. LONDON
  15. Chapter 8
  16. DONOSTIA
  17. Chapter 9
  18. Chapter 10
  19. Chapter 11
  20. Chapter 12
  21. Chapter 13
  22. Chapter 14
  23. Chapter 15
  24. Chapter 16
  25. DUBLIN
  26. Chapter 17
  27. Chapter 18
  28. Chapter 19
  29. Chapter 20
  30. Chapter 21
  31. Chapter 22
  32. Chapter 23
  33. Chapter 24
  34. Chapter 25
  35. Chapter 26
  36. Chapter 27
  37. Chapter 28
  38. Chapter 29
  39. Chapter 30
  40. Chapter 31
  41. Chapter 32
  42. Chapter 33
  43. Chapter 34
  44. Chapter 35
  45. DONOSTIA
  46. Chapter 36
  47. Chapter 37
  48. Chapter 38
  49. Chapter 39
  50. Chapter 40
  51. Chapter 41
  52. Chapter 42
  53. Chapter 43
  54. Chapter 44
  55. Chapter 45
  56. DUBLIN
  57. Chapter 46
  58. Also by John Banville
  59. About the Author
  60. By the Same Author
  61. Copyright

What was served to him, not in a balloon glass but a chunky tumbler, was a sluggish, brownish stuff, viscous as sherry, with a fragrance reminiscent of cough medicine. He drank it anyway, though he knew it would give him indigestion. But it might help him to sleep, he thought. On the other hand, it might just as easily keep him awake. Latterly, his nights had become a mixture of stark wakefulness and fitful, ashen dreaming. He had hoped, with faint hope, that down here it might be otherwise. Surely the least that might be expected of a holiday was that it would foster sleepiness.

‘Look,’ Evelyn said, ‘the girls, they keep their hankies in their sleeves, just like in Ireland.’

His wife, now, she slept as if sunk in a coma. It was good that one of them at least was able to rest, though her preternatural stillness puzzled him. How was it the terrors of her past didn’t rise up to jolt her awake, like bolts of white lightning striking out of the darkness? On this, as on so many things, he hadn’t the nerve to quiz her. From the beginning, she had let it be known that whatever ghosts lingered with her were hers alone, her private hauntings. He used to assume she would confide in him eventually, but she didn’t, and by now it seemed she never would. Secretly, in some black cavern of his heart, he was glad. He had quite enough demons of his own to wrestle with.

Yet there was so much he didn’t know about this intimate stranger he was married to, so much he wasn’t permitted to know. She wouldn’t even tell him her murdered parents’ names. Or how many siblings she had lost. Or which camps they had perished in. One day she let slip that her oldest sister – she didn’t say how many other, younger ones there were – had perished in a German concentration camp, of tubercu losis. This fact, which immediately he saw her regretting having divulged, he took and stored away, as if it were a formal document, signed and sealed, though what it might be a testament to he wasn’t sure.

He told himself the details of her past didn’t matter, and they didn’t, really, although at the same time they did, precisely because of being withheld.

The facts he did possess were few. An uncle who was a doctor and supplied morphine to someone high up in Hitler’s court had got her out of Austria via France and Spain – this, it occurred to him just now, accounted for her knowing San Sebastián and the Hotel Londres. The uncle had gone on to America and made for himself what she, widening her eyes, described as a ‘big, big career’ at the Mayo Clinic.