“Any time your phone buzzes it’s like you jump four feet. You’ve been quiet. Almost too quiet. It’s like you’re worried that if you open your mouth, something is going to come tumbling out like word vomit.” She tucks a stray blonde strand behind her ear and fiddles with her glasses again. “You know you can tell me anything. I won’t judge you.”

Easy to say now. She probably thinks I have a boyfriend at school I’m keeping from everyone. Or that I failed a class. Certainly not that I’ve fallen in love with my older brother and have been letting him fuck my brains out for the better part of the past week.

“There’s nothing to tell, Monica. I promise,” I add for extra measure. I feel guilty lying to her when she can clearly see I’m hiding something, but now is not the time to unleash the truth on her. Or anyone.

“Okay.” She shrugs. “Well, let’s get you back to New York then.”

My leg bounces in anticipation, my skin buzzing with the need to see James. I’m still ten minutes away and he’s already texted me that he’s there waiting for me. Like he’d ever leave me waiting. I can remember the few times he had to pick me up from school and he was never late. I press my phone to my heart and I can’t believe I’ve become that girl who’s this giddy about seeing her boyfriend.

Boyfriend.

James is my boyfriend.

“Holy crap,” I whisper to myself.

“Next stop, New York City,” the conductor says as he grabs my ticket stub from overhead. Minutes later, we are pulling into the station and I’m on my feet grabbing my bags before we are even completely stopped, the adrenaline over seeing James pushing my legs to move even faster. I’m the first one to line up at the door and I’m off the train the second it opens. I start moving towards the escalator when I hear his voice behind me.

“Hi, pretty girl.”

I turn around and I’m stunned to see James on the platform as I assumed he would be waiting outside for me. But now that I think about it, this makes perfect sense. He’s wearing a pair of jeans and a hoodie under his gray peacoat and the mix between casual and business makes my knees weak.