“Who obviously hasn’t forgiven you.”

“Yeah, well, we’ve brokered a sort of truce. Anyway, I escaped to Mundo Base, figured Kylee could help. She did. At least her molecules kept me sane enough to get the two of us out to Rork Springs . . . where I took on another load of quetzal TriNA that sort of flooded Demon’s influence.”

She took his hand, saying, “Pay attention here. I found a way to come to terms. Used that bowl as mental metaphor, a way to piece my brain and consciousness back together. Most days I’m in charge, but not in my dreams. That’s when Demon is loose to terrify me, to haunt me with all the horrible things I’ve done. And he dearly loves to torture, to make me squirm with self-loathing.”

Dek lowered his eyes. “He’s starting to have the same fun with me. Trying to figure out how to access those memories.”

“Dek, understand that what I call ‘Demon’ is a community of related TriNA molecules that communicate with each other through molecular and recombinant means. It’s an incorporeal intelligence, one that utilizes memory and transferRNA to access and operate the cells in my body. Those RNAs are the same on Donovan as they are on Earth. Organic chemistry is organic chemistry no matter what planet you are on. Eventually, Demon’s going to dig out those memories. It’s going to find all the weaknesses and vulnerabilities”

“Then maybe I’d save myself some agony if I just put a bullet in my brain?”

“Maybe.” She hesitated. Did she tell him the truth? “I won’t lie to you. You could end up a psychotic wreck. Maybe some zombie-like mindless weapon. On the positive side, you couldn’t have crawled out of that canyon with a leg full of gotcha vine spines if you didn’t have one hell of a lot of guts and courage hidden away in there. The kind that might see you through this fight.”

“And what if I don’t?”

She locked gazes with him. “We’re being honest, right? So, here’s how it lays out: I like you. Maybe, if things work out, and we both come out the other end, I might even come to love you. But I know what’s inside you, growing, learning. So, you have to understand: If Demon wins, and I see you lose yourself, if you become a threat to Port Authority or anyone here, to Kylee or the Briggses, I’ll shoot you in the back of the head.”

“You mean that, don’t you?”