“Has to be. Hopefully, Caden will have some answers by the time we get there.” She gathered the papers from the table and stuffed them into the manila envelope. She’d set the journal aside, convinced there was nothing in there but Dustin’s private thoughts. One day, she might read them—and share them with Caden—but for now, she knew there was no way she could read Dustin’s words and be privy to his most intimate thoughts without losing control of her emotions. Later, once the violent sting of his sudden passing had eased, she might be able to handle it.

Gavin took her plate to the sink, rinsed it, and stuck it in the dishwasher. Her jaw dropped. “Where’d you learn how to do that?”

He turned and frowned. “Do what?”

“Load a dishwasher.”

He laughed. “It’s not rocket science.”

“Might as well be. Neither Dustin nor Caden ever learned how to do that.”

A knowing smile slid across his lips. “I guarantee you Caden knows how to load one. And I’m sure Dustin did too. It’s just if they played the helpless male, you’d take pity on them and do it for them.”

She shook her head. “I’ve always suspected that. What brats.”

“Don’t tell Caden I broke the ‘bro code’ and revealed one of our secrets.”

Sarah laughed. Then sobered. “I won’t say a word, but he might suspect when I tell him it’s his turn to load the dishwasher.”

“Who’s been loading it since you’ve been here?” Mirth danced in his eyes.

“Well, duh. The dishwasher fairies, of course. The same ones who load yours, I suspect.”

His laughter rang through the kitchen and the sound pierced her heart. He was a good man. An honest one. He had a serious side but didn’t take himself too seriously. He could be deadly in a situation that required it—and yet gentle as a warm breeze on a sunny day. He was a mass of contradictions and he fascinated her. And scared her. He could break her heart without even trying at this point. She’d laid it out there for him and felt like she’d been left in limbo.

He called Asher and Travis and filled them in on their upcoming trip to the hospital, then watched the area while she climbed into the passenger seat. Once they were on the way, she let out a low sigh.

“I’m a very selfish person, aren’t I?” The words slipped from her lips before she could stop them.

He blinked, glanced at her, then back at the road. “What makes you say that?”