After he’d gone I poured myself another glass of wine and contemplated ringing Evie or my dad and telling them what a predicament I’d got myself into. In the end, I decided against hearing their advice; this was something I needed to work out on my own. Instead, I sat in the dark, tears sliding down my cheeks, wondering what had happened to the bright and bubbly Lottie Allbright I used to be and when I’d become so weak. I pressed a hand to my heart; she was in there somewhere, I was sure, and maybe it was time to find her again.

Chapter 4

The next morning, the storm clouds had cleared and so had my head; I knew exactly what I would say to Paula: I needed to do the right thing for me.

When Mum died, I’d gladly given up my university place to be at home with Dad. When he started up the tree surgery business, I’d been happy to join him. We’d had fun, him and I, working together. Every year or so, he’d check that I didn’t secretly wish I was doing something more exciting. I’d always assure him that I didn’t. Then Harvey had come into my life and shaken it up like one of those little glass snow storms and changed everything. And although I’d never had a yearning to live in London, I’d been swept along with his zest for adventure and had happily followed him.

I got up for work, creeping around the bedroom as usual so as not to disturb Harvey, who’d reappeared around midnight last night worse for wear, crashed around in the bathroom, before collapsing in his boxer shorts on top of the bed. I paused, leaning on the door frame to study his face in slumber before I left. His forehead smooth, long lashes brushing his cheeks, his lovely full lips pouting slightly with every out breath; he looked serene and calm, no trace of the demon within that had become the third person in our relationship.

‘Goodbye, Harvey,’ I murmured.

I blew him a kiss he’d never know about and slipped from the flat down to the street below, still quiet at this hour, not even bothering with the pretence of taking my protein shake with me today.