The only bright spot had been on Sunday, the day after Harvey had paid me a visit, when Darren and Evie had called in while they were out walking their new dogs. The two English Setters had made themselves at home straight away and it had warmed my heart to see my sister and brother-in-law so happy. And while Starsky sniffed warily around both of the bigger dogs, Darren told me that they’d made an appointment with an adoption agency and that, fingers crossed, they’d soon be on the waiting list for a child of their own. It seemed that they had got their happy ending after all and I was so pleased for them that I buried my face in Evie’s shoulder and we’d both cried. I’d already told her what Harvey had said and done, and both of them had been furious and horrified on my behalf, agreeing that I should try to put him out of my mind for good.

It would be a long time before I could forget or forgive his actions, but I was determined not to let him mar the baby’s future – or mine, for that matter. I could manage perfectly well on my own if I had to. And thanks to Harvey, it looked as if I might. Before they left, Evie offered to come to my next scan with me. She also suggested I put everything I wanted to say to Jensen in a letter, that way at least he’d know how I felt. And deciding that I’d got nothing to lose, I’d done just that.

I wrote that I’d heard he’d taken the promotion and that I was happy for him and wished him every success. I explained that the things Harvey told me had cast a huge question mark over our relationship. But one thing was certain: I never wanted to see him again as long as I lived. And I tried to express how much Jensen meant to me …

You said that me having another man’s baby didn’t matter to you as long as that man isn’t in my life. I promise you he isn’t, but I understand if you feel differently now. But for me, nothing has changed. You have captured my heart in a way that no one else has ever done. I shall be counting down the months and weeks until you come home, and will pray with all my strength that you feel the same way.

Love always,

Lottie xxx