As Cody gorged himself on our love, I starved for something more.

The white plastic timer dinged just as I carried the casserole dish from the oven to the orange Formica counter with metal trim. It was a mystery why an owner from the past picked this permanent color palette, as it didn’t match a single detail in the kitchen. Heat seeped through the cheap oven mitts, burning my palms. As I rushed to set it down, I felt my feet slipping…then my body falling backward.

The crack! impacted my tailbone first, shooting a jolt of pain up my spine.

After my butt hit the floor, scorching magma spilled across my lap. I screamed and pushed myself upright, feeling sticky orange sweet potatoes covering my legs, chunks of it falling to the floor. I cried out for Cody, partly in pain, partly in fury. In a mental instant replay, I imagined my fall looked something like Joe Pesci tripping on Macauley Culkin’s Micro Machines booby trap in Home Alone. I had never empathized for the sawed-off tough guy until now.

By the time I had scooped most of the food off of me, Cody showed up, laughing hysterically as he grabbed a wet wash cloth to help wipe off my pants. Cody had also laughed like this through Home Alone. God love him, but the man had the attention span and the sense of humor of a ten-year-old boy.

“Are you okay?” he managed to ask.

“It’s not funny!” I wanted to yell at him, but my throbbing tailbone dialed my voice down to a whimper. “I think it burned my legs.”

I glanced at the space on the floor where my feet had given way and saw a puddle of water seeping into the sweet potato juice. Pulling open the cabinet under the sink, I watched a drip, drip, drip trickle down the elbow pipe, splattering on the cabinet base before streaming onto the floor.

“I thought you fixed the leak in the pipe already,” I groaned as I hooked my hands on the metal edge of the counter and pried myself back up. I let Cody lift me, even though I was pissed at him for a reason I couldn’t explain. My rear hurt so bad I could hardly stand.

“I did. I replaced the whole thing.” No he didn’t. “I guess the leak is coming from somewhere else.” Wrong again.