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Back A Private Function
Chapters (21)
  1. Cover
  2. Landing Page
  3. A Private Function
  4. CONTENTS
  5. INTRODUCTION
  6. The Old Crowd
  7. CAST
  8. A Private Function
  9. PREFACE
  10. CAST AND CREDITS
  11. Prick Up Your Ears
  12. PREFACE
  13. CAST AND CREDITS
  14. 102 Boulevard Haussmann
  15. CAST AND CREDITS
  16. The Madness of King George
  17. PREFACE
  18. CAST AND CREDITS
  19. About the Author
  20. Also by the Author
  21. Copyright

ORTON   Nothing. You know me. ‘Thank you.’ Various people kissed me.
It seems he is talking about the lavatory, but as we see Halliwell looking at the award we realise he is talking about the dinner.
Halliwell runs his finger over Orton’s name on the award.

HALLIWELL   You should pack.
Orton is finishing typing and, taking the paper out of the typewriter, he puts it in a loose-leaf folder, which forms his diary.

ORTON   Do you read my diary?

HALLIWELL   No. Why?

ORTON   It puts things in perspective. (Pause.) Should I take my typewriter?

HALLIWELL   No. This is a holiday.

ORTON   Just in case.

EXT. STREET, TANGIER. DAY. 1967.

A long row of Arab boys sitting smiling on a wall. Their heads all turn as Orton and Halliwell pass. Two Arab boys help them with their suitcases. Orton and Halliwell walk along with them, obviously very pleased with this state of affairs, Halliwell particularly. They knock at the door of a house. Another smiling boy opens it.

INT. APARTMENT, TANGIER. DAY. 1967.

Orton and Halliwell are shown round the apartment by the three smiling boys. Particularly the bath and the shower and the beds. All the boys sit on the beds and bounce up and down, laughing a lot.

EXT. THE BEACH, TANGIER. DAY. 1967.

More boys running across the sands, this time with Orton and Halliwell, splashing, etc., in the sea. The music is ‘By the Sea, By the Sea, By the Beautiful Sea’, as in Some Like It Hot.

INT. APARTMENT, TANGIER. DAY. 1967.

Music suddenly stops and Orton and Halliwell are sitting across the kitchen table opposite two of the boys.

ORTON   Which do you want … Abbott or Costello?

HALLIWELL   Which do you think likes me?

ORTON   I’m not sure liking comes into it.
He takes boy onto the balcony. They stand there, looking at the view, as Orton runs his hand down the boy’s back. The boy smiles. Orton sits on the parapet looking into the kitchen, where Halliwell is getting nowhere.

HALLIWELL   And you say your brother’s in Epsom?

BOY 2   Epsom. Yes.

HALLIWELL   Working in a hotel?

BOY 2   Yes. Waiter.

HALLIWELL   Epsom’s in Surrey. Near London.

BOY 2   London. Yes.
Boy 2 yawns. Orton nudges Boy1, who goes into the kitchen and says something to Boy 2 in Arabic. Boy 2 instantly gets up and puts his hands around Halliwell’s neck. They get up and go into one of the bedrooms. Boy 2 leads.

INT. APARTMENT, TANGIER. HALLIWELL’S BEDROOM. DAY. 1967.

Boy 2 making love to Halliwell. Halliwell is trying to keep his wig on. Boy 2 smiles. Reaches out and takes it off. Halliwell stops him. Boy 2 smiles. Pushes his hand away. Takes off the wig and puts it by the bed and smiles. Halliwell smiles.

INT. APARTMENT, TANGIER. DAY. 1967.

Orton and Halliwell are in bed with the two Arab boys.
A joint is circulating.