“She's more forthright. Bolshie. Hugo never said, he was too loyal to Belinda, but I suspect she wouldn't play her mother's game. Wouldn't be controlled. She always wanted to get away, far away. I mentioned her just now, in there, asked him if Etta knew. He said he didn't know, but that before she went to Australia, they'd had lunch together. When she left the restaurant she looked at him very hard and told him to be true to himself. Always. At whatever cost."

Christina nodded. "Hugo wants to visit her in Sydney. Soon. After all this time. But . . . why didn't he tell me? About Belinda. I mean — I knew all about him being gay from a young age, we'd both talked about that, obviously, about realizing at school, the trauma that came with it — but why didn't he tell me about his mother? That conversation?"

"I don't know. Perhaps he was ashamed of what he didn't do. Didn't defy her. Didn't man up. But I think it's more complicated than that. I think he didn't want to cast her in a terrible light. To anyone. Didn't want us thinking badly of her. It's about that loyalty he has to her and that hold she has over him. That love that she offers . . . then withdraws. To the extent that his whole life has to be a lie — at least, when he's with the Bellingdons."

"Yes. Not in London. I mean — we're not blatant, we're so discreet, we have children. It's not an open secret, for their sake. Although it might be one day."

I was quiet. I had nothing to say on this subject. Because I couldn't imagine it. Couldn't imagine the confusion. Was glad the muddle wasn't mine. I sat up a bit. A regrouping gesture.

"Peter knows what's happened," I told her. "I texted Tommy when I knew Hugo was going to be OK, and he said he'd go and find him on the beach and tell him. I worried that it should be me, but Tommy said he wanted to be sure he didn't hear through gossip."

"He's right."

"I know."

"How did he take it?"

“Shocked, obviously. And rang me immediately, but Tommy had done a good job. Had persuaded him Hugo would hate Peter to see him like this, and not to come here."

"Yes, Hugo would hate that."

"Exactly. Does Belinda know?" I asked.