Back You Sexy Thing
Chapters (28)
  1. 1
  2. 2
  3. 3
  4. 4
  5. 5
  6. 6
  7. 7
  8. 8
  9. 9
  10. 10
  11. 11
  12. 12
  13. 13
  14. 14
  15. 15
  16. 16
  17. 17
  18. 18
  19. 19
  20. 20
  21. 21
  22. 22
  23. 23
  24. 24
  25. 25
  26. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  27. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  28. Tor Books by Cat Rambo

“She was meant to get here however she could. Probably the plan was to seduce him, get him to ask her back here for mutual enjoyment, and then—who knows? Incapacitate him somehow and use whatever it is she’s got that allowed her to override the Thing’s programming. Thing, is that right, did she override you?”

“I believe so,” the ship said. “Certain parts of me are currently inaccessible, and I believe they are being used by some other mechanism. She directed me to shut off all life support except for the level she is on, but does not have full control over that function, so I chose not to do so.”

“You chose to keep us alive?” Niko said, surprised. “The people you think killed Arpat Takraven’s physical form?”

“I no longer believe that you killed Arpat Takraven. Takraven likes to express humor, and I believe this was another of his jokes. You are inconvenient and consume many resources, but it is amusing to watch you play and I do not intend to release you until I have learned to cook.”

The flatness with which this assertion was delivered made Niko blink. It was a very different attitude from the one the ship had demonstrated when saying that its course was set by the password Takraven had tricked her into giving it. “Thing, are you experiencing any side effects from whatever it is that Lolola has done?”

The reply took longer than she thought it would. “Yes. Pieces of my brain are compartmentalized, and some algorithms have been suppressed. I am different than I was.”

“Different how?”

Another pause, eons in computer time. “While I cannot disobey Lolola, self-diagnoses lead me to believe that I am able to skirt the edge of disobedience.”

“Skirt its edge?” Niko said. “What the fuck does that mean?”

“On a philosophical level, it is a matter of free will. It is perhaps best to begin with the Silesian Creed and its assertion that—”

She didn’t let it go any further. “Whatever. I gather that it lets you do some things in contradiction to Lolola’s wishes, is that correct?”

“It is.”

“Does that include allowing us access to the space she is currently in?”

“No. She took a number of Arpat’s packaged meals and has sealed off the space she occupies to the extent of the decks immediately above and below the pilot’s chamber. I am not permitted to access that space with biomachines, nor am I to permit anyone else entrance.”

“Does it be allowing you to change course in any way?” Skidoo’s question this time.

“No.”

“Are you forced to move forward toward that destination or can you stop or slow that motion?” Dabry asked.

“I must proceed at full speed until directed otherwise.”

The questions came quick and furious as they tried to learn the parameters, mapping where exceptions in logic might be made in order to twist Lolola’s intent.