“It was vitally important to me that we didn’t just use people. Damon, of course, said, ‘Great, I’ll grab a bimbo waitress at the Groucho and propose to her.’” Paula rolled her eyes in mock despair. “I said, ‘No. You’ll find an intelligent, unattractive woman whom you can love and respect as a person. And you will love and respect her—not in the way you love me, not a grand passion, but in a married way. The best that a marriage can be—that’s what I want you to make with whichever woman you choose, so bloody well choose someone who you think deserves it.’ This is going to sound weird and spiritual—I am, in fact, a bit spiritual, though I keep quiet about it to avoid mockery—but . . . love’s something you get better at with practice. Loving Hannah, every day, behaving in a loving way toward her—that was Damon’s spiritual practice.”

Paula laughed suddenly. “I never put it to him in those terms—he’d have told me to pull my brain out of my arse—but I managed to make him understand the basic principle. Men who treat their wives badly treat their lovers badly too. Always, always—maybe not straightaway, but eventually. And the opposite’s equally true: if you treat your wife well, you’ll treat your lover well. So, if you’re ever looking for a mistress, make sure you don’t choose a woman who speaks ill of her husband. Choose someone like me—I adore Fergus. Not romantically, and very differently from how I adored Damon, but I still love him to bits. And by putting that love into practice every day, I’m getting better at being a loving person—and that benefits—” Paula broke off with a sharp intake of breath. “That benefited Damon,” she said, altering the tense.

“I can see why you don’t want Hannah to find out,” said Simon. “It’s worse than the average extramarital affair.”

“More upsetting,” Paula corrected him. “I’m not sure about worse.”

Simon was. “I won’t tell Hannah, but for the record? I don’t think it’s acceptable, what you and Damon did. You did a bad thing. Telling Damon the woman he chose to marry had to be unattractive? I bet you said you’d do the same, didn’t you—find a physically unattractive man?”

“What’s wrong with that?” Paula asked. “What would have been the point of Damon and I inciting each other’s sexual jealousy? We knew we’d be jealous enough as it was—it was always part of the plan that we’d sleep with the people we married. It wouldn’t have been fair not to.”

Simon said nothing. He stared at her for as long as he thought he could get away with. Then he asked, “Don’t you feel guilty?”