Yep, totally hated her.

“Honey, come here,” I whispered.

He held my eyes. I watched with despair as his eyes grew conflicted, then he dropped his head and looked at his feet as he lifted a hand and curled his fingers around the back of his neck.

Okay, I was wrong.

Before, I just disliked her intensely.

Now, I totally fucking hated her.

“Brock, baby, come here,” I urged.

His hand dropped and his head came up.

“I did not want this for them,” he whispered and I felt my throat clog.

“Come here,” I repeated huskily.

“Did everything I could to protect them from this shit,” he went on. “I should never have taken that cover that took me outta their lives for a whole fuckin’ year.”

I gave up, threw the covers back, and went to him. I got close, wrapped my arms around him, and pressed deep.

I tipped my head back when his arms curved around me and my eyes locked with his.

“She is who she is,” I said quietly. “And because she is, even if you didn’t take that cover, they would eventually learn who she is because she is who she is. You have no responsibility for her actions. You were doing your job. Your job was important but it required sacrifices. There are a lot of important jobs men and women take that require them to make that kind of sacrifice. Soldiers for one. And undercover DEA agents for another.”

“Yeah, Tess, but—”

I interrupted him. “You have to be who you are. If you’re doing something important and you believe in it, you have to do it even if that means sacrifices. You have to do it because that’s how you teach them to do the same.”

“Tess—”

I cut him off this time by giving him a squeeze.

“She’s doing this to herself. Do you think they live in fear of whatever reaction she’ll have, whatever tantrum she’ll throw, and they’ll not cotton on eventually?” I asked but didn’t wait for his answer. I shook my head and gave him another squeeze. “No way, Brock. Those are your boys and they are far from stupid.”

One of his arms left me so he could curl his fingers around my neck as he whispered, “Baby.”

“It’s your duty to teach them to be good men. You learned because you had a good mother, and despite a bad father. They’ve got the opposite. You’re obligated to do this anyway but in this situation you’re all they’ve got. There is no escaping it and it wouldn’t matter what they faced in their lives, you’d still have to do it. And part of being a good man is being a strong one, doing what you believe in, standing up for yourself and the ones you love, protecting them from harm, and you’re doing that. Think about what happened when you were growing up. I’m sure Fern wanted to protect you but she couldn’t. That was your life. You can’t protect them from this because it’s a part of their life. What you can do is help them understand what’s happening around them and teach them how to cope. It sucks that you had to explain to your son that his mother scared him on purpose just to fuck with you but you were right to do it.”