My stomach turned over. ‘What?’

‘You’re burning the sauce.’

*

In spite of my determination to move on from Maryam’s revelation, I kept torturing myself with thoughts of Jack and the vet nurse. It was like a scab that I couldn’t resist picking. I had even started to wonder now if there had ever been any other one-night stands – or worse. After all, I’d have remained in complete ignorance if Maryam hadn’t spilled the beans. I’d have sworn that my lovely Jack could never have had the propensity for infidelity. It set me to thinking then; did I really know him as well as I thought? What about all those late nights at the surgery? Was there was someone else that had caught his eye? After all, I looked such a mess these days, who could blame him? It was one more thing to plague my thoughts as I lay awake at night. I was beginning to feel that I was living under a permanent cloud for one reason or another; that I was never going to be truly content with my lot.

After a particularly bad night, Elodie was still teething and refused her morning feed, throwing her head back and screaming as I tried to offer her my breast. I was so tired that my patience was wearing thin. I gave her some Calpol and laid her back down in her cot. Mercifully the combination of her dummy and the medication gradually did their work, and she drifted off.

I went to let Jobie out after Jack left for work. Mrs Barley was out in her garden, watering the planters that sat outside her back door. Corvus was perched on the fence watching her. Seeing Jobie, he let out a shrill cry and flew off.

‘Morning, Stina. Oh dear, you look as if you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders today. Is anything the matter?’

After Maryam told me about Jack, I had made a sort of pact with myself; that I would never share what I had learned with anyone. But I felt so low and desperately needed someone to confide in. Feeling tears begin to threaten, I tried to swallow them back but somehow it all came tumbling out.

‘I found out that a couple of years ago, Jack was unfaithful to me. Reggie’s partner Maryam told me. She said it was just the once, but now I can’t get it out of my head. What if it happens again? What if it’s already happening? I feel as if I don’t know him any more and it’s eating me up inside.’

Mrs Barley frowned. ‘I’m very surprised to hear that. Are you sure she wasn’t trying to cause trouble?’