“Yeah, I saw her earlier. She’s fine as hell, bro. Good looks locking her down.”

I don’t even have the energy to deal with that so I step around him in search of Olivia. When I find her, she smiles at me which makes my shoulders sag in relief. That is until I get close to her and smell the alcohol coming off her. What the fuck?

When I ask her what the fuck she’s thinking she blurts out, “I’m not pregnant anymore.”

It feels like the ground falls away beneath my feet. Is this why she’s been avoiding me? She’s been dealing with this loss by herself? Fuck, I feel like a piece of shit.

“I didn’t lose it. I went to the clinic and…you know,” she explains.

I’m…confused. From the moment we found out about this baby, we’ve been nervous as hell but excited. At least I thought we were, but maybe it was just me. We’ve been talking nonstop about our plans so that when we tell our parents we’ll already have answers to all the questions they’re going to ask.

If she changed her mind, that’s fine. I can’t tell her what to do with her body so I would’ve accepted it no matter what, but why didn’t she tell me first? She went through all of that by herself and for what? That’s not who we are. She knows damn well I would’ve wanted to be there to help her through it.

She starts ranting about leaving school to join the draft, and I feel like I’m back in my backyard the night of graduation talking to her dad. She doesn’t want me to come with her. As if the idea of me transferring schools to wherever she gets drafted is the most ridiculous idea she’s ever heard. She’s not making sense. It’s as if Jason Harding wrote this shit and she’s just reading off a teleprompter.

What the fuck did he say to her? Because I don’t even know who’s standing in front of me right now.

When she tells me I’m holding her back, I can’t hold back anymore. “The fuck you say?”

“I said, you’re holding me back. I have an opportunity to get the very thing I’ve been working my whole life for, and I realized it would be silly for me to pass that up just for a piece of paper.”

I can’t even listen to the bullshit she’s spewing anymore. I don’t even know how I get through the rest of our conversation before she storms off.

She may have thoroughly pissed me off tonight, but I still need to make sure she’s safe so I text her to check in. She’s at least graceful enough to let me know she’s back in her room.

How did everything I want just slip through my fingers that quickly? How did I go from being so sure I would spend the rest of my life with Olivia to wondering if I’ll even see her again after today?