It’s a vicious cycle.

“Fine Whitney. I just don’t think it’s a good idea for you to go out later.” I’d made the mistake of telling him Chloe and I took an Uber and now he thinks we planned to get hammered. Though after a night of being around JP, I just might.

“With Chloe and Mason? Come on Parker, you can’t be serious.”

“I am serious. Mason won’t look out for you once he sets his eyes on the first thing in a skirt and Chloe will do the same the second, she decides who she’s going home with.”

“Ouch, Parker, tell me how you really feel.”

“I believe I just did and you know it’s true.”

“Babe, I called you because I miss you and I wanted to talk to you. Not to get in a fight. Can’t you just tell me you love me and you miss me and can’t wait to see me?”

“You know I feel all of those things.”

“You’re acting like you don’t trust me and I’ve never given you a reason not to.”

“It’s not that. It’s just if I’m not there to look out for you, who will?” I can remember having this conversation with another man once before and somehow it feels different now. Maybe I really was naïve with JP because I can remember him telling me he wanted to put me over his knee and spank my little ass pink after going out and getting drunk with Chloe one night.

The difference was that was hot and he fucked you senseless with a red handprint still fresh on your ass.

Nope. Shut that shit down, Whitney.

“You’re right,” I tell him. “But you can’t tell me I can’t go out. Just trust that I’ll be careful, alright?”

“Whatever, do what you want, Whitney.” His voice drips with passive aggression.

“You want me to just sit in the house and wait for you to come home? That’s what you want?” Silence. “That’s what you want, isn’t it?”

He sighs and I can imagine him running a hand through this hair and bouncing his leg like he always does when he’s agitated. “I just don’t want you out being reckless when I’m not there. Sorry for being worried.”

I begin walking up the walkway and up the stairs to my front door. “I appreciate that. I think it’s cute that you worry.”

“Just call me when you get in later, alright?”

“Time difference?” I remind him. Knowing that I probably won’t get home until around two a.m. if we go out, which puts the time at five a.m. on the East Coast where Parker is now.

“Don’t care. I want to hear your voice and know you got home safe.”

“Yes, sir.” I giggle and I hear him clear his throat on the other end.

“Don’t start with that,” he says but I can hear the smile in his voice. It was odd, Parker was a little more dominant in our relationship except in the bedroom which actually kind of pissed me off. The place I want to be bossed around and told what to do and he’s actually quite passive. Whereas in our day-to-day life, he took control. Sometimes I didn’t mind it but other times it felt like I didn’t have a say in my own life.