Chapters (87)
- Cover
- Dedication
- Winter 1638, At Sea
- Spring 1638, Virginia
- Summer 1638, London
- October 1638
- Winter 1639
- 1640
- Spring 1641
- Summer 1641
- Summer 1641
- Autumn 1641
- Spring 1642
- April 1642
- July 1642
- August 1642
- October 1642
- Winter 1642–3, Virginia
- April 1643
- May 1643
- Spring 1643, England
- Summer 1643, Virginia
- Summer 1643, England
- Winter 1643, Virginia
- Spring 1644, Virginia
- Spring 1644, England
- April 1644, Virginia
- Summer 1644, England
- October 1644, England
- Winter 1644, Virginia
- January 1645, England
- April 1645, England
- Summer 1645, Virginia
- Autumn 1645, England
- Autumn 1645, Virginia
- Winter 1645, England
- Winter 1646, Barbados
- Spring 1646, London
- Spring 1646
- Summer 1646
- Autumn 1646
- Spring 1647
- Summer 1647
- Autumn 1647
- Spring 1648
- April 1648, Oatlands Palace
- Summer 1648
- July 1648
- Autumn 1648
- January 1649
- Saturday 20 January 1649
- Monday 22 January 1649
- Tuesday 23 January 1649
- Wednesday 24 January 1649
- Thursday 25 January 1649
- Friday 26 January 1649
- Saturday 27 January 1649
- Sunday 28 January 1649
- Tuesday 30 January 1649
- Spring 1649
- Summer 1649
- Summer 1650
- Autumn 1650
- Spring 1651
- Summer 1651
- Autumn 1651
- Winter 1651
- Autumn 1652
- Spring 1653
- Winter 1654
- Spring 1654
- 1655
- March 1656
- April 1656
- Summer 1657
- Summer 1657
- Autumn 1658
- Spring 1659
- Summer 1659
- Autumn 1659
- Spring 1660
- Summer 1660
- Autumn 1660
- Winter 1660
- About the Author
- Also by the Author
- About the Publisher
He lifted his gaze from the fire, as if he suddenly remembered where he was. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘And then let’s go to bed. I have wanted you in my bed for night after long night, Hester. I have missed you, and thought of you here, missing me. I have wanted you and cursed the miles that were between us. And in the morning I shall see my children and we’ll tell them that we are leaving.’
‘You have wanted me?’ she asked, very low.
He put his hand out and turned her face up to him, one gentle finger under her chin. ‘Knowing that you are here has kept me going through one dark night after another,’ he said. ‘Knowing that you are here and that I have someone to come home to. Knowing that you will open your bed to me, and open your arms to me, and that whatever is going wrong all around me, I have somewhere that I can call my home.’
She could have moved forwards, she could have kneeled before him as he sat in his chair, he would have drawn her to him and on to his lap and he would have kissed her, as he had never yet kissed her, and they could have gone to bed as he wanted to do, and as she had wanted to do from the moment she had first seen him.
But Hester caught hold of her determination, forced herself to wait, and drew back from him, drew back and sat on her seat on the other side of the fireplace.
‘Now wait a minute,’ she said. ‘Not so fast, husband. I cannot leave here.’
For a moment John did not hear her. He was so conscious of the fall of her nightgown, and of her dark hair only half-hidden by her cap, of the play of the firelight on her neck and the glimpse of her shoulder. ‘What?’
‘I cannot leave here,’ she said steadily. ‘This is my home.’
‘You don’t understand,’ he said abruptly. ‘I have made up my mind. I have to go. I cannot stay here, I will be torn apart by the two of them – king and Parliament. Parliament will have me out entrenching and drilling for their defence, and the king will summon me to court. I cannot be faithless to them both. I cannot watch the king ride into war as if it were a masqued ball. I cannot stay in England and see him die!’
‘And I cannot leave.’ She spoke steadfastly, as if nothing would ever move her.
‘You are my wife,’ John reminded her.
She bowed her head.
‘You owe me absolute obedience,’ he said. ‘I am your master before God.’
‘As the king is yours,’ she said gently. ‘Isn’t that what this war is all about?’
He hesitated. ‘I thought you wanted to be my wife?’