He shot me a look and put his coffee down so he could take my hand in both of his. “You don’t have to worry or be scared when it comes to anything with me. I will never pressure you for sex. You mentioned cuddling on the couch and watching movies or hugging and kissing?”

I swallowed hard and somehow managed to nod. “I like those things. I want all the romantic things. I like holding hands and I love kissing. I love it. It makes my heart do some pretty weird shit and I get butterflies. And hugs are… well, a good hug can fix a wounded soul.”

Hennessy grinned at that.

“So I want all that,” I admitted. “But I don’t want anything else. I see all the naked pics on Twitter and Grindr, and for the life of me, I can’t figure out why they don’t put clothes on. Like I have zero interest in that. And the random gifs of porn are like, Jesus, is that really necessary? Not one part of it appeals to me. I think I can honestly say I’ve masturbated like twice in the last twelve months, which is probably far too much information than you ever needed to hear, but one of those times was just to see if I could even get aroused and the other time was, well, more of an attempt at stress relief, which evidently had the opposite effect. But I just want a boyfriend who I can sleep in with on Sundays, whom I can cuddle with or touch just because he’s close, and I want all that without him wanting more. And that’s probably selfish, I realise that. But I can’t be in another relationship where I’m walking on eggshells and praying he doesn’t want sex.” I shuddered at the thought. “I just can’t.”

Hennessy smiled and let out the mother of all breaths. He looked up at the sky and shook his head, and I thought for sure I’d blown it.

I’d crossed a line and said I wanted something he won’t do… I pulled my hand away and stood up, wanting to leave but not sure my feet would take me. “I’m sorry. Was it the kissing? Do you not like that? Or the idea of sleeping in on Sundays? I mean, not the actual sleeping in part, but the sleeping in the same bed part.”

He stood up too and grabbed my arm. “God no. Jordan, everything you said, all those things, it was like you read my list of what I want. Everything, exactly as you said it.”

“You like kissing?”

“Very much.”

“And hugging?”

“Can fix a wounded soul.”

For some stupid reason, my eyes got all watery and my heart was trying to trample its way out of my ribcage. “Really?”