I chewed on my bottom lip, my eyebrows narrowed, and I wanted to object, but I shrugged with a resigned sigh. “Well, I’d say you’re… you’re not wrong.”

“I know I’m not.” He gave me a nudge with his shoulder and he smiled.

“Isn’t that what everyone wants?” I asked, looking up at the sky before looking at him. “Not romance or love, exactly. I’m aware of my aromantic brothers and sisters.” I raised a fist before letting it fall heavily back to my lap. “But we all strive for something. It might not be hearts and roses for everyone, but doesn’t everyone want something to fulfil them or someone to connect with on some level?” I shrugged, feeling less confident now and more vulnerable. Here it was, the leap into the discussion we needed to have. “Is it not human nature to find our own tribe? We all want that one thing, whether it’s someone to meet your every sexual need, or maybe it’s someone who loves to cuddle on the couch, or maybe it’s someone who knows the last three answers in the cryptic puzzle you can never get every damn time, or maybe it’s someone who loves Dungeons and Dragons just as much as you do, or maybe they love olives on pizza and will pick them off yours for you. Finding someone to share your life with doesn’t have to be based on sexual compatibility. I mean, if you want someone to pound you into next week while you’re chained to a cross, then by all means, I hope you find them and live happily ever after in your red room of pain. Or if you want someone who doesn’t want to ever have sex but still enjoys hugs and kissing, hand holding, and snuggling on the couch to watch movies, then hell the fuck yes, you should find that person. Or two people, if poly’s your thing. Whatever floats your boat, have at it. Find your one person, your tribe. Be happy, be content.”

“You’re sex-positive,” he said, with the hint of a smile. “Meaning you have no issue with sex itself.”

“Totally. If sex gets your motor running, then go have all the sex you want. As long as it’s consensual and healthy or whatever, then yes. Go do that.” I made a face. “But it’s not for me.”

He nodded, then sighed and smiled with what had to be relief. “Me too. I just want people to be happy, and I totally respect their desire to want sex, but I also want them to respect my desire to not have sex.”