My life had always been centered around my career. My apartment in Nashville had been a place to go in between workdays. Holden’s house, as well, had been a nearby place to rest my head when I wasn’t working. Without a career, what was left?

I’d gone from a top-tier manager of an international company to nothing in two seconds flat. For a dozen years, I’d garnered my confidence from my career. Gained my self-worth from it. I’d been proud to work for a globally known and respected hospitality company. That’s who I was.

I’d lost it all in the blink of an eye, and now… I no longer had a clue who or what I was. Where I was going. It was like I’d lost my entire identity.

An awful wail escaped me as I came upon Henry’s and took a left on Main. When I got to Holden’s street a block later, I couldn’t make myself turn down it. Instead, I kept driving, again trying to hold back the racking sobs as my mind raced with a tempest of thoughts and emotions.

You failed.

You tried to believe you were all that, but you weren’t.

You turned Holden’s life upside down for nothing.

I drove all the way to the city, noticing none of the drive, arriving at my apartment building’s parking garage without thinking about it. Pulling into my assigned parking spot as if it hadn’t been more than a month since I’d been there.

After looking around to ascertain no one was in the vicinity, I climbed out, feeling ninety years old, my body heavy and sore as if I’d been dragged behind the car instead of in the driver’s seat, then hurried to the elevator with my head down.

When I let myself into my apartment, an odd feeling washed through me. The place was familiar but different, even though everything looked the same. It didn’t quite feel like home either. I’d taken my clothes and food and some other personal effects to Holden’s, but the furniture was all here, the wall hangings still in their places.

Letting my purse fall to the floor, I went to the couch and sagged into it. I picked up one of the pillows and hugged it to my chest, as if that could stem the physical pain. It couldn’t. Nothing could.

Pulling my feet up, I reclined and curled onto my side, resting my head on another pillow and letting the sobs come until they ran out, a long, indefinable chunk of time later, leaving me depleted and limp. At some point the sun went down and the room turned dark. My stomach growled but I didn’t care. I wasn’t sure I would ever move off this couch.