I placed the last stuffed lion on the gray bookshelf next to the gray crib that Kellon put together, and stepped back to admire months of hard work. Hard work I’d insisted on us doing ourselves. Despite my rich baby daddy’s desire to pay someone to do it for us, we did it ourselves. The nursery was finally done.

I walked over to the rocking chair and lowered myself carefully, rubbing my swollen belly. In less than two weeks, I’d be meeting my son. It was surreal how much my life had changed in the last almost nine months. I could barely wrap my head around it all, but it was all for the better. Doing something I’d always dreamed of doing, I picked up my phone, opened the video app, and hit record.

“Hey, baby,” I said softly. “It’s your mama. You’re not here yet, but you will be soon.”

I angled the phone to get my belly in the frame.

“You’re entering a world with so much love. Daddy and I just finished your room. I designed it. Daddy painted it and put together your crib. What I’m trying to say is your parents have been loving you since the second we knew you were in my belly. I can’t wait to meet you, hold you, kiss you, and show you this big, beautiful world…”

My words trailed off as I wiped the tears from my eyes before they could fall. I hit save just as Kellon walked in carrying the thick baby book we’d been slowly filling out since month five.

“Phee, I know you not still in here crying,” he teased then dropped a kiss on the top of my head.

“I can’t help it.” I sniffled. “We’re going to be parents soon.”

“We are.” He sat down in front of me and tucked a folded envelope into the back of the book.

“What’s that?”

“A letter… for J when he’s older.”

“Oh, so I can’t see it?” I smirked, reaching for it. “Y’all can’t be keeping secrets from Mama.”

“If you insist.” He pulled the letter out and removed it from the baby blue envelope. “I would read it to you, but I think you may want to read it yourself.”

He handed me the letter. I hadn’t even read the first few lines before tears built up in my eyes again.

J,

I hope you always know I wanted to be your father before I ever saw you. You changed my life just by existing. Still, if you’re reading this, then it means you’re old enough to start asking questions. You may have read something online or heard something from a friend that has made you question who your family is.

There are answers in this letter that will be best coming from me. The truth is, Ty, I’m not your biological father.