Every Gumm-Gumm in the bleachers stopped what they were doing and turned to face the largest TV they’d ever seen. Their misshapen jaws went slack and drool began to drop. Gunmar, unaffected by the static, roared his disapproval, but his minions could not hear. They leaned toward the screen, intoxicated. The humans remained curled into frightened balls, unwilling to make a move. It was Sergeant Gulager, of course, who led the way, stepping up to the nearest troll, waving his gun in front of the glassy, unresponsive eyes, and then, at his leisure, firing a bullet right through the softies.

The crowd woke up, began to cheer themselves on, and then, in short order, overwhelmed the hypnotized Gumm-Gumms, pouring over the trolls like ants and pinning their comatose bodies to the bleachers. Tub moved like a maestro in the sound booth, drizzling a little more soda here and dumping a lot more there to keep the static at its most lush and frisky. At some point he tripped the audio, and the warble of a dozen different radio stations blared from the speakers in total sonic confusion. I could see Tub fiddling with knobs, but matters were far out of his control.

“Jim! Wake up!”

It was Jack, hollering at such volume that his voice broke into adolescent splinters. He had removed his mask and his pale, sweaty face showed none of the relief I felt. Behind him I saw why: Blinky was rolling around on the turf, whimpering in a register of pain I’d never before heard, a half-dozen destroyed tentacles spewing thick violet liquid. ARRRGH!!!, meanwhile, was backed into a light pole, her hackles raised in bedraggled defense, her black fur shining with blood.

With a blasting laugh, Gunmar used all six arms to lift ARRRGH!!! high over his head. The lights atop the pole released glass shards that stabbed into the flesh of both trolls. ARRRGH!!! wrenched about but was as helpless as I’d ever seen her. Gunmar reared back and threw her huge body twenty yards through the air, a missile of horns and teeth and fur, and into the end zone, where she collided with the goal posts at such speed that they crumpled into tangles of steel. Several feet of dirt and turf billowed upward from the impact.

There was no movement from the fallen trollhunter.

Dirt and grass eddied in the air of the end zone.

“NO!!!” Jack shrieked.

Gunmar’s single eye jerked about like a lizard held by the tail.

“YESSSSSS…COME TO ME, SSSSSSTURGESSSSSS.…”