“Nice shot, honey!” Harry bellowed, and Luke realized the man was yelling to his wife, who was hiding behind another hay bale a few feet away. “Come on,” the man ordered, grabbing Luke by the arm and all but hauling him to the bunker.

“I got ’em both!” Sally yelled, with gleeful aggression.

“You sure did, babe.” Harry reached across Luke to give his wife a hug. “I love you so much.”

“I love you, too.” Sally leaned over Luke and wrapped her arms around her husband.

And then the two were doing more than hugging; they were kissing. Eyes closed, mouths mashing together, with Luke stuck between them, their paint guns jabbing him in the ribs. “Uh, folks?”

“God, you’re so amazing,” Harry groaned.

“No, you’re amazing,” Sally panted.

“You both are amazing,” Luke assured them, sliding to the ground. Above him, the make-out session continued unimpeded, and he prayed a red player would come around the corner of the hay pile and take out all three of them. Or at the very least, him.

“Hey.” He poked one of them—he hoped it was Harry—in the side. “I think someone is coming.” At first it was just wishful thinking, an attempt to call a cease-fire before the couple got too carried away. But a moment later, Luke really did hear footsteps approaching.

He squeezed his eyes shut, bracing himself for the kill shot. Harry and Sally would go down happy, and good for them. But after a few moments of nothing happening—not counting the unsolicited amorous activities going on over his head—Luke risked opening one eye.

Julia stood there, mouth hanging open, as she gaped at the scene in front of her. He imagined what he must look like from her angle, legs sprawled on the ground, with Harry and Sally above him, making out like the world was ending.

“Ah, am I interrupting something?” she asked, lips pursing.

What was that look on her face? Surprise? Horror? Amusement? A little of all three?

“I don’t think these two can be interrupted,” Luke grumbled.

Julia burst out laughing. She came closer, nudging Sally. “Hey.”

Nothing.

She poked the butt of her paint gun into Harry’s back. “Hey!”

The couple remained oblivious, a moaning, groaning mass of heavy breathing and smacking lips.

“You weren’t kidding.” She shook her head. “I’ve heard of a kiss making you forget the world around you, but this is something else.”

“God, this is awkward.”

The thhrrrrup of a zipper opening caught both their attention.

Julia’s eyes widened. “I think it’s about to get a lot more awkward.”

“That’s it.” Luke thrust his arms up, forcing the two lovebirds to break apart.

“What’s the matter?” Harry asked, blinking in dazed confusion.

“Are we under attack?” Sally fumbled for her paint gun.

Watching this tableau unfold, Julia burst into laughter.