Without a word, she went into his arms and they clung to each other.

“Alinor,” was all he said, and then he kissed her.

Alinor leaned back against the hayrick, her knees weakening beneath her as if she might fall to the ground. She made a little movement and he released her. “Not here,” was all she said.

“Not here. Will you come to the Priory?”

“I don’t dare.”

“Can we go to your cottage?”

“Alys is at home.”

He was silent. “Is there nowhere we can go? You know the woods, the mire, the little pathways?”

“I couldn’t lie with you on the mire.” She gave a little shudder and at once he put his arms around her and drew his cape around her. “Not with the tide high,” she said. “It’d be like drowning. Could we go to the chapel? We could sit in the porch?”

He shook his head. “I have lost my faith, but that would be too much. I couldn’t—forgive me, my love—I can’t.”

“Of course,” she said, and thought what a loose slut he must think her to even suggest it. “I didn’t mean . . .”

“I want you so much I think my heart will stop,” he said. “Anywhere, anywhere!”

“I don’t think there is anywhere for us,” she said quietly, and then she was struck by the words. “Oh, it’s true. D’you see? There’s nowhere for us, not on Sealsea Island, not in all the tidelands, not in the world.”

“There must be!”

“And besides, aren’t we here to say good-bye?”

“I can’t bear to say good-bye to you in this meadow again!”

“Last time you came back, as you had promised,” she reminded him shyly.

“Last time I was ordered to come back. Next time, I will come back a free man. I will come back for you.”

“I don’t think that can ever be.”

“It will. I will be freed of my vows. I will go and see my parents, I will buy back our house in Yorkshire, and I will come for you.”

Her hands twisted in his and she tried to pull away. “You know—”

“No, listen to me. I can confess my sins and be released from the priesthood.” He tightened his grip as she shook her head. “That is my choice. It is what I want.”

“But you were risking your life for your faith! You told me that it came before everything.”

“I did. But that was before Newport. My love, I failed in my mission and I lost my faith. I lost my faith in everything: king and God. I will leave the priesthood whatever happens, and I will never again come to England as a spy. I will not serve the king again—God bless him and may he have better servants than I. I have failed him and I cannot bear to fail again. That part of my life is over.”

“Even so . . .”

“Alinor, I won’t change my mind. I have lost my faith, I have lost everything. I can’t tell you, but there is a darkness where once there was a burning light. The only thing I care about now is you.”