“Awesome! I’ll go make a quick copy for everyone.” She prances off and I’m jealous, missing the days I was that carefree.

Trevor takes the empty seat next to me. “You okay? I haven’t seen you in forever. And you seem kind of out of it.”

“Yeah. Fine.” I slap my notebook closed, hiding my doodles. “Just have a lot going on lately.”

“Are you sure? You always have a lot going on.”

“Marvelous, darling. Simply marvelous,” I drawl.

“Tiptop?” he asks with a boyish lopsided grin.

“Shipshape.”

“A-okay?”

“Yep.” I break routine with our standard playful banter. We usually go five or six rounds with cutesy salutations, but I just don’t have the patience tonight.

“Well…” He runs his hands through his hair and blushes. “We could go grab a bite? If you wanted to talk or anything.”

I’ve known Trevor since the second day of our Freshman year. And I’ve known he’s had a crush on me since the third. We flirt and tease—I even let him kiss me on New Year’s once—but he’s never been anything serious. He’s one of a million distractions that doesn’t seem so fun anymore.

“I’m actually seeing someone.” It might be an exaggeration, but it doesn’t feel like a lie.

“Oh, wow.” His eyes go wide and his jaw drops open. “Since when?”

“A few weeks now.” I smile, remembering the past few weeks with Devin. The first time he touched me. The first time he kissed me. The first time he growled at me. I’m not ready for our firsts to be over.

“Congrats, I guess,” Trevor adds with a dejected lilt. Poor guy. He never had a chance, but I guess he doesn’t know that.

“Thanks. It’s been hard finding time to see him, but we’re trying.” I swallow hard and press my lips together tight. I might as well just tell him. “In fact, I think I’m going to stop coming to study group. For a little while at least.”

“Oh,” Trever says, crestfallen.

“I’m sorry. I’ve just got so much going on and I just don’t have the time anymore.” Guilt dumps over me like a bucket of ice water.

“But you’re still going to be on the volleyball team next month, right?” he asks.

I wince and shake my head. “I told Maddy I’m not going to be able to play.”

He’s nodding but frowning. I feel like I’ve kicked a puppy. I want to take it back, tell him I’ll be there, but I won’t let myself. I picture Devin’s dark eyes to keep myself focused on what I really want.

“I…I’m sorry,” I stutter.

“Don’t worry about it. The year’s almost over anyway. Had to end sometime, right?”