‘And it’s been a long time since yer father … hush, hush, cos we never talked about it. Then Frank said, I reckon your mother deserves a bit of happiness, eh, luv?’

‘Luv?’

‘Vicks and luv and darlin’. I told them they could do what they want and Mum said, We wouldn’t do it unless you were happy.’

Don wrapped the chips, and said to Vicky, ‘I remember you, this big.’ He showed her. ‘You and Clem, kissy-kissy.’ And for the first time ever, he smiled.

‘No kissy-kissy,’ I said.

‘Long time,’ Don said, remembering, at last, the pair of us with bottles and mixed lollies.

We left, past Ford, ripping a hole in the bag and eating chips.

‘So, no Frank?’ I said.

‘He pissed off, and Mum blamed me. Then the lecture about love coming in different sized packages.’

‘But not with a bushy mo.’

‘Or hairy back, big, muscly legs and single eyebrow.’

‘Disgusting.’

‘I said, Frank, why don’t you shave the bit in between, but he said, Na, Vicks, this is how God made me. I didn’t mention that: he was religious, and everything happened for a reason, and that’s why Mum had run into him at the butcher’s, because God wanted them to be together.’

‘A religious PE-teaching stepdad. Shit.’

‘Don’t worry, he wasn’t around long. Look!’ She indicated a motorised scooter parked in front of a Housing Trust unit.

I knew the look, and smiled. ‘Vicks.’

‘Come on.’

‘No.’

But she was off. ‘Once around the block. They’ll never know.’

‘She’s disabled.’

‘She’ll never know.’

I ran after her. She sat on the scooter, turned the key, and motioned for me to dinky.

‘No.’

‘Get on, you pussy.’

Why, I wondered, did I attract friends like this? Even Curtis wouldn’t hijack a scooter, although John would’ve stolen it. ‘You’ll get yourself in a lotta trouble.’

‘You comin’ or not?’

The eyes, the dimples. You couldn’t say no. I got on and she drove down Lanark III, over the mound, at maximum speed. I held on to what was left of the chips. The suspension wasn’t so hot, and every bump was amplified up my arse and backbone.

‘That’s enough, let’s take it back.’

But she wasn’t listening. Past the primary school, narrowly avoiding a man walking his dog (and the dog). Over a raised drive, and we nearly went flying, but held on, and passed onto the road, in the middle, left, as we were overtaken.

‘Okay, you’ve had yer fun.’

‘Where’s yer spirit, Clemmy?’