Helmuth hadn't known; or if he had, he had been conditioned to forget it. He gripped the arms of the chair tighter.
"Anyhow," he said, "that's the way we are."
"Yes,, it is. Also it has nothing to do with the matter."
"It doesn't? How stupid do you think I am? I don't care whether or not you've decided to have a child here, if you really mean what you say."
She, too, seemed to be trembling. "You really don't, either. The decision means nothing to you."
"Well, if I liked children, I'd be sorry for the child. But as it happens, I can't stand children and if that's the conditioning, too, I can't do a thing about it. In short, Eva, as far as I'm concerned you can have as many kids as you want, and to me you'll still be the worst operator on the Bridge."
"I'll bear that in mind," she said. At this moment she seemed to have been cut from pressure ice. "I'll leave you something to charge your mind with, too, Robert Helmuth. I'll leave you sprawled here under your precious book what is Madame Bovary to you, anyhow, you unadventurous turtle? ... to think about a man who believes that children must always be born into warm cradles a man who thinks that men have to huddle on warm worlds, or they won't survive. A man with no ears, no eyes, scarcely any head. A man in terror, a man crying: Mamma! Mamma! all the stellar days and nights long!"
"Parlor diagnosis."
"Parlor labeling! Good trick, Bob. Draw your warm woolly blanket in tight around your brains, or some little sneeze of sense might creep in, and impair your efficiency!"
The door closed sharply after her.
A million pounds of fatigue crashed down without warning on the back of Helmuth's neck, and he fell back into the reading chair with a gasp. The root of his beard ached, and Jupiters bloomed and wavered away before his closed eyes.
He struggled once, and fell asleep.
Instantly he was in the grip of the dream.
It started, as always, with commonplaces, almost realistic enough to be a documentary filmstrip--except for the appalling sense of pressure, and the distorted emotional significance with which the least word, the smallest movement was invested.
It was the sinking of the first caisson of the Bridge. The actual event had been bad enough. The job demanded enough exactness of placement to require that manned ships enter Jupiter's atmosphere itself; a squadron of twenty of the most powerful ships ever built, with the five million ton asteroid, trimmed and shaped in space, slung beneath them in an immense cat's cradle.
Four times that squadron had disappeared beneath the racing clouds; four times the tense voices of pilots and engineers had muttered in Helmuth's ears, and he had whispered back, trying to guide' them by what he could see of the conflicting tradeblasts from Jupiter V; four times there were shouts and futile orders and the snapping of cables and men screaming endlessly against the eternal howl of the Jovian sky.