'Aren't you leaping to conclusions just a little bit early?' asked Havisham, obviously concerned by the lack of objectivity in Tweed's report. 'Do we even have a motive?'

'We all liked Vern,' said Tweed, 'me included. Despite being a villain in Potternews, he never gave us any cause for alarm. I was surprised by what I found, and you might be too.'

He pulled a piece of paper from his top pocket and unfolded it.

'This is a copy of a refusal by the Council of Genres narrative realignment subcommittee to agree to Deane's application for an Internal Plot Adjustment.'

He pinned it to the board next to the picture of the maidservant.

'In it he requests that the maidservant die in childbirth, thus saving his character from the traumatic scene at the end of chapter twenty-eight when the maidservant turns up with the infant, now aged six, to his wedding to Ellen O'Shaugnessy, the wealthy mill-owner's daughter. With the maidservant out of the way he can marry O'Shaugnessy and not suffer the degrading slide into alcoholism and death that awaits him in chapter thirty-two. I'm sorry to say that he had motive, Miss Havisham. He also had the opportunity – and the Jurisfiction skills to cover his tracks.'

There was silence as everyone took in the awful possibility of a Jurisfiction agent gone bad. The only time it had happened before was when David Copperfield murdered Dora Spenlow so he could marry Agnes Wickfield.

'Did you search his book?' asked Falstaff.

'Yes. We subjected The Squire of High Potternews to a word-by-word search and we found only one person who was not meant to be there – a stowaway from Farquitt's previous book, Canon of Love, hiding in a cupboard in Potternews Hall. She was evicted back to the Well.'

'Have you tried the bookhounds?' enquired the Red Queen, running a cleaner through the barrel of her pistol. 'Once they get on to a scent, there's no stopping them.'

'We lost them at the fence-painting sequence in The Adventures of Tom Sawyer.'

'Tell them about the Perkins connection, Harris.'

'I think that is assumption, Bellman, if you please,' answered Tweed.

'Tell them,' repeated the Bellman, his shoulders sagging. 'I think everyone needs to know the full facts if we are to hunt Deane down.'

'Very well,' replied Tweed, upending a box and depositing a huge quantity of full stops, commas and semicolons on to the table.

'We found these hidden at the back of Deane's locker. We had them analysed and found traces of Guinness.'

'Ulyssesl' gasped Benedict.