'Name?'

'Alan.'

Rochester signed and returned the slate and was instantly handed eleven more, all wiped clean of their carefully written notes.

'Enough!' roared the King. 'I will not have my court turned into a haven for autograph hunters! We pursue the truth here, not celebrities!'

There was dead silence.

'But if you wouldn't mind,' said the King, passing his notebook down to Rochester and adding quietly: 'It's for my daughter.'

'And your daughter's name?' asked Rochester, pen poised.

'Rupert.'

Rochester signed the book and passed it back.

'Mr Rochester,' said the Gryphon, 'I wonder if you might expound in your own words on what Miss Next's actions have done for you?'

The court fell silent. Even the King and Queen were interested to hear what Mr Rochester had to say.

'To me alone?' replied Rochester slowly. 'Nothing. For us, my own dear sweet Jane and I – everything!'

He clenched the hand that carried his wedding ring, rubbing the band of gold with his thumb, trying to turn his feelings into words.

'What has Miss Next not done for us?' he intoned quietly. 'She has given us everything we could want. She has released us both from a prison that was not of our making, a dungeon of depression from which we thought we should never be free. Miss Next gave us the opportunity to love and be loved – I can think of no greater gift anyone could have been given, no word in my head can express the thanks that are ours, for her.'

There was silence in the courtroom. Even the Queen had fallen quiet and was staring – quite like a fish, I thought – at Rochester.

The Gryphon's voice broke the silence.

'Your witness.'

'Ah!' said Hopkins, gathering his thoughts. 'Tell me, Mr Rochester, just to confirm one point: did Miss Next change the end of your novel?'

'Although I am now, as you see, maimed,' replied Rochester, 'no better than the old lightning-struck chestnut tree in Thornfield orchard, I am happier than I have ever been. Yes, sir, Miss Next changed the ending, and I thank her every evening for it!'

Hopkins smiled.

'No further questions.'

'Well,' said the Gryphon after the court had been adjourned for the King to consider what form the sentence should take. The Queen, unusually for her, had called for acquittal. The word sounded alien on her lips and everyone stared at her with shock when she said it – Bill the lizard almost choked and had to be slapped on the back.

'The outcome was a foregone conclusion,' said the Gryphon, nodding his respect to Hopkins, who was organising some notes with the White Rabbit, 'but I knew Rochester would put a good show on for you. The King and Queen of Hearts may be the stupidest couple ever to preside over a court, but they are, after all, Hearts, and since you were undeniably guilty, we needed a court to show a bit of compassion when it came to sentencing.'