The little girl remained standing there mercilessly, while her mother did her hair at the vanity. Soon the movers would come tramping in, and carry down the furniture he wanted to take. She had begged him to take everything, to stay in the house and chase her out, if only she could keep both children. Fathers always forget their children when they haven’t seen them for a long time. But what did she really know about that? If she had been more confident, she could have invoked the law, which rarely separates a child from its mother. But she wasn’t certain about anything anymore, and she wasn’t used to making big decisions on her own. Two different men wanted her to make this sacrifice. ‘You can’t take everything from him.’ She owed it to two men. But a person doesn’t sacrifice a child, do they? Well, she was doing it. Only her. It was her fault, and the most innocent of all people would pay for it. Here in this room, with the child beside her, she felt completely alone. Even the furniture seemed to shrink from her. Everything she knew was receding into a fog. If only it all could go back to how it was before! But nothing is ever the way it was. Life is change: passion, indifference, death. She was afraid of her child, afraid of all the life awaiting her downstairs: Miss Hansen’s tearful, shaming, uncomprehending eyes; Ole’s questions; and her husband’s pained face. Oh God, this child! If only she had been a bit younger or a bit older. The people we love, she thought, as she put makeup on her pale face. What can I say? How can I stop it? My love, come and help me. Maybe it’s too late for you to come. The pain of this morning will always be mine and mine alone. You will feel jealous if I even mention it. But all of us are alone. We three adults have been living here together in this house all these years. We love the children and they love us, and now we have to lie to them. How can I live a virtuous life when the footsteps and voice of a man can turn my heart away from everything that once gave me comfort? Why did I get married? Why did I have children? There is nothing so merciless as love.

Her eyes met the child’s observant ones in the mirror, and she smiled at her. The girl jumped up on her mother’s lap and put her warm cheek against her mother’s. ‘Mommy, today you have to eat breakfast with us, okay?’ she said ingratiatingly, using the fine little voice she used – the one she had used quite often lately – when she wanted to chase away unpleasantness between the grown-ups.