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Contents ( 8)
  1. The Time of Your Life
  2. Contents
  3. Act One
  4. Act Two
  5. Act Three
  6. Act Four
  7. Act Five
  8. Author Biography

Joe (loudly) I never learned to dance.

Kitty Anybody can dance. Just hold me in your arms.

Joe I’m very fond of you. I’m sorry. I can’t dance. I wish to God I could.

Kitty Oh, please.

Joe Forgive me. I’d like to very much.

Kitty dances alone. Tom comes in with a package. He sees Kitty and goes gaga again. He comes out of the trance and puts the bundle on the table in front of Joe.

Joe (taking the package) What’d you get?

Tom Two dollars’ worth of toys. That’s what you sent me for. The girl asked me what I wanted with toys. I didn’t know what to tell her. (He stares at Kitty, then back at Joe.) Joe? I’ve got to have some money. After all you’ve done for me, I’ll do anything in the world for you, but, Joe, you got to give me some money once in a while.

Joe What do you want it for?

Tom turns and stares at Kitty dancing.

Joe (noticing) Sure. Here. Here’s five. (Shouting.) Can you dance?

Tom (proudly) I got second prize at the Palomar in Sacramento five years ago.

Joe (loudly, opening package) OK, dance with her.

Tom You mean her?

Joe (loudly) I mean Kitty Duval, the burlesque queen. I mean the queen of the world burlesque. Dance with her. She wants to dance.

Tom (worshipping the name Kitty Duval, helplessly) Joe, can I tell you something?

Joe (bringing out a toy and winding it) You don’t have to. I know. You love her. You really love her. I’m not blind. I know. But take care of yourself. Don’t get sick that way again.

Nick (looking at and listening to Wesley with amazement) Comes in here and wants to be a dish-washer. Faints from hunger. And then sits down and plays better than Heifetz.

Joe Heifetz plays the violin.

Nick All right, don’t get careful. He’s good, ain’t he?

Tom (to Kitty) Kitty.

Joe (he lets the toy go, loudly) Don’t talk. Just dance.

Tom and Kitty dance. Nick is at the bar, watching everything. Harry is dancing. Dudley is grieving into his beer. Lorene Smith, about thirty-seven, very overbearing and funny-looking, comes to the bar.

Nick What’ll it be, lady?

Lorene (looking about and scaring all the young men) I’m looking for the young man I talked to on the telephone. Dudley R. Bostwick.

Dudley (jumping, running to her, stopping, shocked) Dudley R. (Slowly.) Bostwick? Oh, yeah. He left here ten minutes ago. You mean Dudley Bostwick, that poor man on crutches?

Lorene Crutches?

Dudley Yeah. Dudley Bostwick. That’s what he said his name was. He said to tell you not to wait.

Lorene Well. (She begins to go, turns around.) Are you sure you’re not Dudley Bostwick?

Dudley Who – me? (Grandly.) My name is Roger Tenefrancia. I’m a French-Canadian. I never saw the poor fellow before.

Lorene It seems to me your voice is like the voice I heard over the telephone.