No reply. Manners had eroded in this terrible heat, I thought. Londoners were unaccustomed to tropical life. And Mrs Hudson’s new ice box, purchased for us all by Holmes, was often empty. Ice was very expensive, and income, of late, had been scarce. I felt a twinge of guilt about my recent holiday.

‘We really must clean this place up, Watson. Get back in her good graces.’

He picked up a cigarette and lit it with difficulty. I shook my head.

‘Foolish, Holmes. You forget that I am a doctor. I know more of injuries than you do.’

‘I am careful, Watson. One can train one’s muscles, extend the ligaments over time with repetition. How else might one dance the ballet?’ He waved his good arm in a dramatic arc.

‘Over time, perhaps some so built can do so. But with repetition, you can also have your arm hanging uselessly out of the socket, Holmes.’

‘Watson, you win the ill temperament sweepstakes today. And this, after a successful trip in which you won money, swam, ate well—’

‘Stop! I am not interested in hearing this!’

‘You have gained two – no, three pounds. And I see you have begun a diet, starting today. Failing, however.’

‘Holmes!’ He could not possibly know this. It had only been a thought that very morning.

He grinned at me. ‘You have celery in your waistcoat pocket. You hate celery. One cannot buy celery on the train, therefore you have brought it with you all the way from Bath. I wager you planned to eat the celery on the train instead of—’

‘Stop!’

‘But a sandwich must have won you over. Salmon, no doubt. Day One of your reducing plans, and already you have failed!’

I shook the newspaper roughly and returned to my article in a fury. I glanced down surreptitiously at my waistcoat. Indeed, a piece of celery poked out. He was right about it all. In a fit of pique, I tossed the celery to the floor.

It landed next to a plate of uneaten food, a collection of seashells, a revolver, a dog’s collar, and what might have been a piece of flesh-coloured rubber and was perhaps a false nose. Home.

I looked up at him. ‘The salmon, Holmes?’

‘I will admit that was a guess. But it is your favourite.’

‘You never guess!’

‘But of course I do. Watson, let us call a truce. No luck, then, with your secret box in Bath? You would be crowing over that, if so.’

I glowered at him. ‘Two locksmiths failed to open it.’

The sound of the doorbell interrupted us, and Mrs Hudson appeared, announcing ‘a lady who would not give her name but insists that you have some papers of hers.’ She eyed the room with distain. ‘If you can find them.’