We sit together and watch the sunset. In the half-light I can hear the calls of distant animals. They speak in languages I don’t recognise or perhaps simply don’t care enough to understand. I know then that I must leave, that I cannot stay. Everything has its place, and this isn’t mine. Not any longer.

I lead Simone into the dark of our bedroom. She lays herself down and I watch her sheer dress as it clings to her body. The effect is maddening. She removes it and for a moment I see the bodies of my imagined conquests in the space behind her. A surging mass of arms and legs, lips and thighs.

I watch as they slowly merge together to form the body of my wife.

She calls to me then, the sum of my want. And I go to her.

XLIII

In the morning I wake alone from a dream that the three of us were at sea. We worked on our hands and knees to build a shining tower that rose for miles and reflected the water all around it. A shimmering monument that grew smaller in my rear-view mirror with each passing mile.

Never vanishing completely.

Acknowledgements

Untold thanks to my wife for reading draft after draft and believing in me on the many days I couldn’t bear to. She carries my heart.

Thanks to Toby and Seth, my children, who are the best of me. To my mother for her unwavering love and support. To the countless professionals working to illuminate the fields of neuroscience and psychology.

Finally, my sincere thanks to the entire team at Fairlight Books for taking such incredibly good care of me.

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The Therapist

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FAIRLIGHT MODERNS

Bookclub and writers’ circle notes for all the Fairlight Moderns can be found at

www.fairlightmoderns.com

Sophie van llewyn

Bottled Goods

Longlisted for The Women’s Prize for Fiction 2019, People’s Book Prize for Fiction 2018 and The Republic of Consciousness Prize 2019

When Alina’s brother-in-law defects to the West, she and her husband become persons of interest to the secret services and both of their careers come grinding to a halt.

As the strain takes its toll on their marriage, Alina turns to her aunt for help – the wife of a communist leader and a secret practitioner of the old folk ways.

Set in 1970s communist Romania, this novella-in-flash draws upon magic realism to weave a captivating tale of everyday troubles.

‘It is a story to savour, to smile at, to rage against and to weep over.’

—Zoe Gilbert, author of FOLK

‘Sophie van Llewyn has brought light into an era which cast a long shadow.’

—Joanna Campbell, author of Tying Down the Lion