“All the more reason for me to go away for a while.”

“When do you want to go?”

“Soon. After we spread Flo’s ashes.” She reached for Cara’s hand. “God give me strength.”

IT WAS A balmy night on the beach. The moon was ghostly, barely visible in the rolling clouds. Linnea and Cara sat side by side on towels beside a turtle nest that was due to hatch. They both welcomed the opportunity to escape the confines of the indoors to the fresh, freeing air of the seaside to clear their minds.

“I’d forgotten how much I love to sit on the beach at night,” Cara said in a low voice. “I’m spoiled living here. Sometimes I take all this beauty for granted. It’s out here all the time. It’s a funny game the mind plays on you. Sometimes I walk through the living room and don’t even look out the windows.”

“I know. I do it too. We get so caught up in what we’re doing, we don’t stop to look around and take stock.” Linnea breathed deep. “Oh, that air,” she said in a soft groan of pleasure. “It feels like silk.”

Cara leaned back on her arms. “I think we both really needed this. My heart feels battered and my mind… let’s just say I’m on overload.”

“Me too.”

It was nearly midnight. They’d been sitting at the nest since 9 p.m. and the turtles had yet to emerge. A group of hatchlings sat at the top of the nest, their dark flippers and beaks poking out of the sand, forming a circle that always made Linnea think of a chocolate chip cookie. She and Cara couldn’t leave the nest now. Not on such a dark night when the moon and stars were blanketed by clouds. The hatchlings might be drawn to the streetlights rather than the natural light over the sea. Especially not when the emergence was imminent.

“Cara?”

Linnea felt a chill, even on a sultry night. The velvety darkness cloaked her in a security that gave voice to even her most private thoughts.

Cara turned her head to peer at her through the darkness.

“I guess this isn’t the best time to ask for your advice.…”

“Why? Are you in need of some?”

“Badly.”

Cara straightened and slapped the sand from her palms. “Ask away.”

“If you came here to relax…”

“I came here to take my mind off Flo. This is just what the doctor ordered.”

Linnea brought her knees up and rested her chin on her arms as she stared out into the vast sea. “I’m falling apart.” She heard her voice break and struggled to tamp down her emotions.

“Oh no…”

Linnea took a breath to be able to speak. “I’ve spent the summer trying to pay it forward. Like you said. I’ve tried to be supportive, helpful. Especially now, when the whole world is in crisis. But in the process, I’ve managed to hurt two men I care a great deal about. I’ve failed.” She wiped her eyes. “Utterly. And I’m so sad. All the time. I feel so…” Her voice broke. “Lost.”