I could hear foreign voices raised in the kitchen and stopped listening to my companions. When I again became conscious of what they were saying I heard Lili arguing. ‘...Not soft and soggy,’ she was saying.

I must have looked inquiring, for Robert explained, ‘We are debating whether beans should retain some bite.’

‘It doesn’t really matter,’ said Lili, losing interest. ‘They’ll bring it the way it is anyway. They think we’re stupid about food.’

I said, ‘I think they’re right.’

Everyone looked faintly surprised, for I hadn’t previously volunteered a remark.

‘Hashed mutton,’ I said by way of explanation, ‘and tinned spaghetti on toast.’

‘Oh yes,’ agreed Lili gloomily. ‘No wonder the English look so awful.’

‘Margaret doesn’t look awful,’ said Robert, as though it was expected of him.

‘We,’ said Lili, ‘have just managed to force down sufficient amounts of fresh veg and protein to retain some shapeliness and complexion.’

I found it odd that Robert had chosen to distinguish me alone as English and wondered how he saw himself and Lili and I found it odd that Lili had chosen to lay claim to Englishness. I hadn’t yet learned that she was able to change her nationality as she changed her accessories, to suit the occasion. She was skilled at being English, but she was more interesting when she was half-Arab.

They talked about art, and I drank too much because I had nothing to say. I felt that my life fitted me as ill as a garment designed for somebody else.

I don’t know how I got the following impression from Lili. I don’t believe I was listening to her very closely. Not listening was always one of my faults and one of the reasons I so frequently found myself isolated in misunderstanding: like a careless rider, cut off from the company, alone and benighted for failing to pay attention to the prevailing agreements as to intention and direction. After a while the other riders don’t even bother to come and look for you. They leave you to amble into the desert on your own, and when you come to think of it you can’t really blame them.