He’s asked me this before, and I’ve told him a thousand times that the intimate wedding we had was all I wanted, but he still worries that I wanted a big blow-out wedding ceremony and reception and that I feel let down.

‘It was just what I wanted,’ I tell him again. ‘It couldn’t have been better.’

He puts his arm around me. ‘I agree,’ he says, pressing his lips to the top of my head.

My smile must have faltered though, probably because the memories of the wedding are so bittersweet, because Liam notices and frowns. ‘What’s the matter?’ he asks.

‘Nothing,’ I say, trying to brush away the feeling. ‘I’m fine. I’m good.’

I don’t want him to feel like I’m ruining the honeymoon by moping. I already ruined the first one; we didn’t get to experience any newlywed bliss because my mum died the day after our wedding. We were on the way to the airport when I got a call from her neighbour, telling me she was dead.

‘You know your mum wouldn’t want you to be sad,’ Liam says, intuiting my thoughts. ‘She’d want you to be happy.’

It’s the same lecture I gave myself in the bath earlier and I nod, swallowing away the hard lump that’s risen up my throat. ‘I just don’t get why she had to die,’ I whisper, immediately wishing I hadn’t spoken the thought out loud.

My mum had breast cancer. She’d fought it for four years, but she was responding well to the treatment and the doctors were hopeful she’d pull through. It’s so unfair. She was meant to grow old. She was meant to be a grandmother. She wasn’t meant to die so soon. I still can’t get over the injustice of it.

‘The best thing you can do is live your life,’ Liam says to me now. ‘And be happy, for her sake. It’s what she’d want.’

‘I know,’ I say, kissing Liam’s cheek. ‘Isis would love it here,’ I add, changing the subject. ‘It’s a shame we couldn’t bring her.’

‘She’s fine, don’t worry,’ Liam says as we continue strolling up the beach. ‘The kennel’s more like a luxury dog spa. It’s costing the earth.’

I laugh, though we did get a discount because I know the owners from my time working at the vet. Isis, our black lab mix, will be well looked after, but I still miss her. She’s my companion in the daytime when Liam’s out at work; she often lies with me, on top of my feet, when I find myself too tired and too sad to get out of bed. It feels strange to be without her now, as though I’m missing a limb. I keep scanning around for sticks to throw her.