Bea thought of London, far away, and all the people she’d left behind. She thought of her and Dan and the days ahead, and Alex, left there, stranded. They reached the door.

‘Alex –’

He stopped on the front step, mild and unsuspecting. ‘Yup?’

She wished she knew what to say.

‘Do you think you’ll go to an online meeting tonight?’ she asked.

‘I don’t know,’ he said. ‘Maybe.’

He was sheltered by the porch, and she was in the rain, trying to make him stay with her, outside, where they were free and could talk.

‘When you do,’ she said, ‘you know, at the meetings – are you open with them?’

He became still and closed, withdrawing from her. ‘Let’s go in,’ he said.

Bea didn’t move either.

‘I need to go,’ he said, insistent.

‘Why?’

‘She wants me to.’

She couldn’t let him leave. She stood looking up at him.

‘So, if you went online tonight, Alex. To the group you go to –’

‘Yes, what?’ He was impatient.

‘Can you talk about anything?’

He came down the steps towards her, suddenly, and took her arm, pressing himself close to her, cheek to cheek, but looking past her into the darkness, and she sensed the strung-tight heart of him. The rain was heavier now, falling on them, wetting her hair.

‘People talk about all kinds of shit,’ he whispered, close to her ear. ‘You wouldn’t believe the fucked-up disgusting shit that people do.’

She was frightened, but felt hopeful, too, closer to truth than she had ever come. Stepping back, to see him clearly, she said, ‘I would. I really would.’

He didn’t speak. She could not read him.

‘There’s nothing you can say that would shock me,’ she said. ‘There’s nothing in the world that’s unsayable, and I will never, ever think badly of you.’

They looked into each other’s eyes, rain drops falling from his hair, trickling down his face.

‘Come in,’ he said. ‘Please, Bea.’

He opened the front door and she followed him in. Her mother was still in the kitchen and the door was closed. She didn’t know where her father was. Alex started off, then stopped and turned.

‘I’ll be back tomorrow night,’ he said.

‘Where are you going?’

‘It’s just a thing I do for Dad, I told you. They’re going after that. It’s fine.’

‘And tonight?’

‘It’s all right.’

Liv opened the kitchen door.

‘Darling?’ she said, hating to see her children talking.

‘Coming,’ said Alex.

Liv retreated, and the fire door shut.

‘I wish …’ He smiled. Perhaps he was imagining resolution. A future.

‘What?’

The kitchen door opened again. Liv. Hair tucked behind her ears, tea towel in her hand.

‘Are you going to leave me to clear all of this up by myself?’ she said.

‘Sorry, Mum,’ said Alex.

He followed on. The door closed with the sound of being sealed. Bea went upstairs. She heard her father’s footsteps in the hall.

‘ALEX!’ he shouted. ‘Don’t you own a fucking umbrella? It’s pissing down! I’m off for my walk.’