There has been considerable speculation lately about an extraterrestrial disease being contained at the Lagrange Four Naval base. Very damaging rumors have spread, prompting acts of desperation, panic, and violence. The UEN Council has found it advisable, therefore, to lay out the true facts of the case.

As opposed to the false facts? Ivan smiled despite a growing case of nerves.

First, let me state that there is indeed a quarantined ship under study at the Naval base. The crew discovered something while prospecting in the asteroid belt. Let me assure you that, contrary to rumors, no one has died. To the extent the scientists and doctors of the ICDC have been able to determine, there is no communicable disease.

Technically true, Ivan thought, but only if you omitted certain details.

What the artifact does show, with one hundred percent certainty, is that we are not alone in the universe. And let me be clear about this. We discovered an artifact only. The technology is advanced, but it is only technology. There is no alien being held captive at Lagrange Four. There is no invasion fleet bearing down on us.

Wow. Ivan began to wonder if absolutely everything that came out of a politician’s mouth was such cleverly constructed B.S. In all fairness, no, most of it wasn’t clever.

What we do have is an opportunity. An opportunity to carefully study a technology far in advance of ours. An opportunity to bootstrap ourselves to the next level. Our scientists have reported, for instance, that the technology appears to be able to draw power from the very fabric of space. Imagine a world where all of our energy needs could be met, with no danger of pollution, waste heat, fallout, or contamination.

I urge you all to see this not as a situation to be feared, but as an opportunity to enrich ourselves.

Ivan stared at the screen, as the President continued to talk, his words carrying less and less content as the rhetoric ratcheted up. Finally, he finished, and prepared to take questions. Given the not-quite-truths in the speech, Ivan doubted that the Q&A would be a masterpiece of candor. Sighing, he aimed the remote and changed the channel.

He was distracted by a rush of images and emotions.

The computer seemed to be reacting to the President’s speech. The artificial lifeforms were still descending on Earth, and the dishwashers were still happy to see them, but the computer seemed to be adding politics to the mess. Now the conflict was expanding to other star systems, with different groups of artificial beings doing battle with different groups of chrome animals. There were alliances, victories, defeats…the only constant seemed to be that dishwashers and artificials stuck together, and the chrome animals stuck together. In addition, chrome animals absorbed non-chrome animals, while the artificials wiped them out.