It would have been easy to give way, because she didn’t even like school. She had never lived in one place long enough to get used to it. As soon as she started to feel at home in a classroom, the bags were packed and ready in the hall. Silje didn’t care if it was the middle of term. If it was time to move, they moved. And that’s what motivated Meja. Being someone different. Being herself.

It was three kilometres to the Silver Road and the bus stop. You won’t like it when November comes and it gets dark, Birger had warned her. But it was already dark. The forest was a mass of shadows around her and she kept her eyes firmly on the gravel to avoid seeing the movements among the trees. The code for the gate was a combination of numbers she had to learn by heart, because they wouldn’t let her write it down. She found out later it was the date of Birger’s birthday. The gate whined in the silence and she could feel Birger’s eyes staring at the back of her neck. She was careful to shut the gate after her and then began jogging, past the sad-looking grey pines and naked birches. The ground squelched and crackled under her feet and she thought she could smell snow in the air, even though the first frosts hadn’t arrived yet.

Her throat was stinging as she reached the road, and she had to stand well away from the verge so the bus driver could see her. He was a short, florid man who drank coffee from a flask and spoke so abruptly she could barely understand what he said, other than that he asked after Birger.

The bus gradually filled up with students from the surrounding villages. She rarely saw any houses, just the signs that pointed in among the trees. The kids stood by the roadside and waited. Meja could see rosy cheeks and their breath in the chilly air. She shut her eyes and leaned her head against the cold glass when they got on. She felt them looking at her. Her eyelids burned with their curiosity, but they left her alone.

Tallbacka School was in Glimmersträsk and consisted of a single-storey red-brick building that was more like a barn than a school. The windows were draughty and most people in her class kept their coats on. Inside the swing doors were rows of green lockers. Meja hung her jacket on its hook inside her locker and ran her hand along the bookshelf until she felt the blister pack. She broke out one of the blue tablets and swallowed it without water. When she shut the locker door there stood Crow with her spiky pink hair.

‘Your parents don’t know you’re on the Pill, right?’

‘I’ve moved in with Carl-Johan.’

Crow’s eyes widened. ‘And he doesn’t know?’