Confused, I looked around, but the cave had disappeared. Instead, there was Polaire, carrying a fan in one hand and splaying the other at her hip, smiling coldly at me. I shrank back in fear, the shock of seeing her alive making my knees buckle.

“You want to cast shadowglass, child?” Her voice was brittle, mocking. “Do you think to cast the spell and that will be all there is to it, Tea? Foolish girl. You have always been foolish. It’s why Parmina rejected you all those years ago, when you first came to the Willows to make your mark as an asha, none of us knowing you would do so with soot and ash. You have always been blind to consequences. That’s how you killed me.”

I shook. “Who are you?”

My sister-asha grinned. “I am the truth, you stupid chit. Always have been. You traveled here to see me judge you worthy of shadowglass. I’m here to tell you that you won’t be. Have a look.”

She stepped out of the Valerian. I followed—and stopped.

Kion was in flames. I could hear the screams of those trapped within buildings, heard the wood collapsing under the weight of fires. I saw bodies in the streets, and smoke sending soot into the blackened sky. I saw friends, lifeless, with unseeing eyes and outstretched arms. Beyond the destruction, I could make out the shape of the azi as it flew overhead, breathing death down into the city. Frantic, I reached out to the daeva but could not connect with its mind.

This is a nightmare, I told myself. I reached for a burning piece of wood without thinking and then cried out in pain, dropping it. The pain was intense and all too real.

“This is what happens when you take shadowglass,” Polaire said. “This is what happens when you fancy yourself worthy of a god’s heart. You will bring about Kion’s destruction. You will wreck the lives of everyone you have ever loved, and you will doom them to hardship until the end of their days. We of the shadow can pass no falsehood through this mountain, and you know in your heart that this is your fate.

“Your duty to the lands outweighs your duty to those you call friends, those you call allies. The world must burn in order to heal. Do you still find yourself worthy, Tea of the Embers? Do you still accept this responsibility?”

I knew then that she told the truth. Already I had ruined lives. Already I had imagined Kion burning. “Yes,” I choked out, still weeping and cradling my burnt hand.

Polaire vanished, and the rest of Kion with her. I stood inside the dark cave once more, but this time only two paths remained open to me, their passages yawning into night. But my wound remained, and I had to bite my lip against the throbbing pain.