‘I will tell him as soon as we speak,’ I assured him tightly and held my smile until he had got out of sight.

As I made my way along the passages to the Farseekers hall, my false smile fell away and it was only the fear that I would encounter someone that kept me from giving way to grief, for I knew from the look on Rushton’s face that I had made a dreadful mistake in leaving him so soon. He had just discovered how Ariel had tampered with his thoughts and emotions, using my image as an instrument of torture, and I had believed that knowing what had been done to him had healed him, and that any other damage was no more than scrapes and bruises that would fade in time. Like a fool, I had even imagined that some time alone away from the intensity of our renewed love would allow him to complete his healing. But the terse words of his missive and the cold face he had just shown me were clear signs that he had once again fallen victim to the false thoughts and emotions implanted by Ariel.

I wanted so badly to tell myself that he was merely overburdened by all that needed doing before the four ships left for the Red Land, but troubled as I was by the news, it had not stopped me feeling joy and longing at the sight of him. Thank goodness the press of people had prevented me rushing to his side the moment I saw him. Bad enough that he must have seen all that longing and love writ large on my face. I clenched my teeth and told myself that I must find the strength to behave with dignity and sense. Whatever lay between us, Rushton was master of Obernewtyn and I would need to work with him to prepare for the journey to the Red Land. Another wave of sickness flowed through me at the knowledge that the time we would spend at sea, which I had imagined as being filled with love, must now be given to helpless longing and regret on my part and perhaps to revulsion on his.

The pain of this prospect was so sharp that I had to stop for a moment and lean against the cold wall. I drew long steadying breaths, asking myself what else I could have done but to obey Maruman when he said that the Agyllians had commanded me to return immediately to the mountains. A cold calmness came to me with the knowledge that even if I had known what it would do to us, I would still have had to leave him.