She wanted to reach out to him, to hold his hand as she had earlier that day, but her fingers remained locked together around her mug. Harry’s shoulders shuddered, his breath heaving out of his lungs, before he righted himself and cleared his throat again.

“Sorry, I just, I can’t stop thinking what I could have done, what we could have done differently, if we could have all made it, if we hadn’t tried to be heroes.”

“You are all heroes in my eyes,” she whispered, finally finding the courage to reach for him, just a touch, her fingers brushing over his and settling there, his knuckles beneath the pads of her fingertips. “And you deserved to survive, Harry. Don’t for a second think that you didn’t deserve to live.”

“And Peter?” he asked. “I should have fought harder, I should have—”

“You did everything you could for him, Harry. There’s nothing more you could have done,” she said, thinking of her sister meeting the Nazi commander and what that one decision might have done to change all their fates, Addy’s included. “You know, in a way, though, I do understand the guilt you feel at surviving.” The words were hard to say, but she forced herself to continue. “Losing my brother, knowing there was nothing I could do to help him, it’s all-consuming sometimes. I still ask myself why, why he was the one taken, and then I start to push everyone away from me, even my sister sometimes.”

Harry’s brown eyes pulled her in so hard that her breath caught in her throat, but she stayed put, resisting the urge to flee.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I know me saying that won’t help and it sure as hell won’t bring him back, but for what it’s worth, I’m sorry.”

She forced a small smile. “It actually means a lot to hear you say that. And I’m sorry too, for what you’ve been through. I’m sorry my sister let you down, that she did something like that without talking to us first.”

A warm silence hung between them for a moment as they sipped and sat, eyes settling more easily on one another across the table this time.

He never moved his fingers, but he did look back up at her, and she saw the softness within him, a kindness there that pulled her all the way in.

“I can’t stop thinking about him, that’s all. I don’t blame her, Peter knew what he wanted and I’ve seen how kindhearted she is, I know she did what she thought was right,” Harry whispered. “But what if I’m the only survivor? What if no one ever believes what happened to us?”