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Chapters (57)
  1. Cover
  2. About the Author
  3. Part One
  4. Claudine
  5. Zara
  6. Henry
  7. Zara
  8. Zara
  9. Claudine
  10. Henry
  11. Zara
  12. Claudine
  13. Henry
  14. Zara
  15. Claudine
  16. Henry
  17. Part Two
  18. Claudine
  19. Henry
  20. Claudine
  21. Henry
  22. Claudine
  23. Henry
  24. Part Three
  25. Zara
  26. Claudine
  27. Henry
  28. Zara
  29. Claudine
  30. Zara
  31. Henry
  32. Part Four
  33. Claudine
  34. Henry
  35. Claudine
  36. Henry
  37. Claudine
  38. Henry
  39. Part Five
  40. Claudine
  41. Henry
  42. Henry
  43. Zara
  44. Zara
  45. Claudine
  46. Henry
  47. Claudine
  48. Zara
  49. Claudine
  50. Henry
  51. Claudine
  52. Henry
  53. Claudine
  54. Henry
  55. Claudine
  56. Zara
  57. THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING

I’d be lying if I said the past six months haven’t been intense. Only now has the news coverage started dying down. I thought I had it bad with the paparazzi before. I had no idea. They were after me twenty-four seven. We even had to bring on a couple extra security guys to help Dave out. Being in the center of a story like this has totally made me rethink my obsession with Claudine Longet and true crime in general. It seems so interesting and almost sexy when you’re looking in from the outside, watching it on a screen. You’re a voyeur. It’s entertainment. But when you’re on the inside, when you’re directly involved with a case of humanity gone bad? There’s nothing sexy about it. It’s not fun to follow and shout out ideas and theories. It’s sad and awful. The people whose lives are affected are real. I had been so enamored with that People cover of Claudine, all those photos of her and Andy walking into the courthouse—how beautiful, defiant, and glamorous she looked. Now the thing I think about the most is her kids being in the house that night she shot Spider. Then how she sent them all outside to wait for the ambulance. I picture them all crowded on the front porch in silence. Listening to the sirens get closer and closer.

I’m sure the reason I think about this is Thomas. That’s the thing that really got the paparazzi going: him moving to L.A. with me. He needed a fresh start. There were photos of us all over Twitter. Then on every supermarket tabloid:

A CHRISTMAS MIRACLE: ZARA SAVES LIVES AND FINDS LOVE AT ASPEN SOIRÉE

THE COLORADO KID: THE TRAGIC TRUE STORY OF ZARA’S NEW BEAU

LIAM WHO? THOMAS COOKE HELPS ZARA GET HER GROOVE BACK

Okay, I have to admit, I liked that last one.

So far things between Thomas and me are going great. I told him not to worry about finding a job for a while. I’m starting my tour in a few weeks, and he’s coming with. In the meantime I suggested he take surfing lessons or some TM sessions. Try on California. He’s doing those things but he can’t stand not working, so he’s tending bar a couple nights a week at a dive in Eagle Rock. Which is perfect. I don’t want to say the name because I don’t want anyone going there besides me and the regulars. I love it. Go in exhausted after my tour rehearsals. Just sit at the end of the bar with the locals. We small talk when things are slow. Nobody cares that I’m there. It’s nice for a change. The only problem we’re having is I think Pip likes him better than me.