‘Angry,’ Selena said. Turned the word over. ‘No. I was sad; I was so sad. I couldn’t figure out why he’d do that, not at first. But angry . . .’ She shook her head. ‘No.’

Conway waited, but she was done. ‘And then? Did you figure it out in the end, yeah?’

‘Not till afterwards. When he died.’

‘Right,’ Conway said. ‘So why was it?’

Selena said, simply, ‘I was saved.’

Conway’s eyebrows shot up. ‘You mean you – what? Found God? Chris broke it off because—’

Selena laughed. The laugh startled me: fountaining up into the air, full and sweet, like laughter out of girls splashing in some tumbling river, miles from any watcher. ‘Not saved like that! God, can you imagine? I think my parents would’ve had a heart attack.’

Conway smiled along. ‘The nuns would’ve been delighted, though. So what way were you saved?’

‘Saved from getting back with Chris.’

‘Huh? You said being with Chris was great. Why did you need saving?’

Selena examined that. Said, ‘It wasn’t a good idea.’

That flash again. Wrapped in the pearly mist was someone wide awake and careful, someone we’d barely met.

‘Why not?’

‘Like you said. He messed around all the other girls he was with. Going out with someone brought out his worst side.’

Conway trying to box Selena in, Selena leading her in loops. Conway said, ‘But you said he never did anything bad on you till after you split. What bad side did being with you bring out?’

‘It hadn’t had time to, yet. You said it would’ve, sooner or later.’

Conway dropped it. ‘Probably would’ve,’ she said. ‘So someone saved you.’

‘Yeah.’

‘Who?’

So smooth and easy, it slid out.

Selena thought. She thought without moving: no ankles twisting or fingers weaving, not even her eyes flicking; just still, gazing, one hand loose in the other.

Said, ‘That doesn’t matter.’

‘It does to us.’

Selena nodded. ‘I don’t know.’

‘Yeah. You do.’

Selena met Conway’s eyes straight on. She said, ‘No, I don’t. I don’t need to.’

‘But you’ve got a guess.’

She shook her head. Slow and adamant: the end.

‘OK,’ Conway said. If she was pissed off, she didn’t give any sign. ‘OK. The phone Chris gave you: where is it now?’

Something. Wariness, guilt, worry; I couldn’t tell. ‘I lost it.’

‘Yeah? When?’

‘Ages ago. Last year.’

‘Before Chris died, or after?’

Selena thought about that for a while. ‘Around then,’ she said, helpfully.

‘Right,’ Conway said. ‘Let’s try this. Where were you keeping it?’

‘I’d cut a slit in the side of my mattress. The side that was against the wall.’

‘Good. So think hard, Selena. When’s the last time you took it out?’

‘By the end I knew he wasn’t going to text me. So I only checked last thing at night, sometimes. Just in case. I tried not to.’