As he walked toward the kitchen, I couldn’t help but wonder about him and his life now. It had been over a century since I died, and I knew by the brokenness in his eyes when he looked at me that the grief still weighed on him. But he had a son-in-law now and a grandson. I wondered if they gave him peace. This oasis was full of new memories now, happy ones with life and little Rae’s laughter. I wondered what their life was like. Rae had been to a beach to collect shells and now he was going to Issale, I wondered where else they’d taken him. Or how many disguises he’d had and what his fake names had been. I wondered which animal he shifted into. His name was Raeven, so I wondered if he was a raven, his father was an eagle. And if so, was it a chicken or the egg thing? Did he turn into a newborn raven so they named him that? Or was it manifested? Or did Akecheta have a vision?

I wondered what Auryn’s life in Issale would be like if she was not a shifter. I had so many questions about Issale and what it was like seven centuries ago. Technically I was free to ask questions because it was all past tense. But I couldn’t bring myself to voice any of them. As Everest walked back over with a mug and a loaf of bread, I realized I couldn’t voice my questions because I was afraid they would cause him pain. Because most of my questions were about his life. I knew better than to think Sweyn wasn’t involved so I wondered how often he saw her. Or if he was living with her already the way he was in Avolire in the future. There were things I decidedly did not want to know, not yet, not now. But even while I didn’t want to hear, I found I hoped he was enjoying his life somehow. Did he have friends? Did he do anything for fun or enjoyment?

“What thoughts run through your mind right now?”

I closed my eyes and leaned into him. “You.”

“I cannot decide if I like that or not.” He held the mug out to me. “Drink. ‘Tis water. You feel dehydrated.”

Yeah, ‘cause I’ve been crying my eyeballs out. But I didn’t say that. I just brought the mug to my lips and drank. The water was cold and fresh, probably collected from the river outside. Once I gulped the entire mug full of water, he handed me the loaf of bread then took the empty mug. Normally I would’ve asked for about a pound of butter to slather onto this bread but now that I was holding it, I realized I was absolutely starved. I was several bites in before I realized he’d gotten up.

“Everest?”