With Satyendra gone, her own time of judgement was coming. While he was alive, her crimes had to be hidden for the good of the house, but from today there would be no more excuses to hide behind. It was time to confess. She had been touched by the Wild, tainted, and soon everyone would know.

Deep down, there were feelings, a great flood of them that she neither understood nor wanted to experience. Being alone is torture! Without distraction I am left with my thoughts. I am tired of them. They only bring misery and are of no practical use.

It was time to do something. Though she would not be so crass as to get involved with proceedings, she could at least go for a walk around the castle to reassure herself that things were in hand. And then, she reasoned, should someone wish to quietly ask my advice, I could give it in a non-official capacity.

She got up and immediately felt better. Checking that the feather was still hidden within the rest of her hair was automatic now, the shame reduced to a dull twinge, mostly forgotten, mostly bearable. Satisfied, she left her chambers, being careful not to seem too purposeful. I’m just going for a walk to help clear my head. A mourning mother hoping to see a friendly face.

The staff that she passed inclined their heads to her. Some showed respect for her sacrifice, a few showed happiness for her great honour, but most of them didn’t know what to show, and just seemed awkward.

Perhaps the tradition isn’t for me at all. It’s for everyone else.

She began to suspect that she shouldn’t have come out. It was selfish, and the castle seemed to be running perfectly well without her.

Soon, the Bringers of Endless Order would emerge from the Rebirthing Chamber and she would know one way or another if it had succeeded. Yadavendra seemed confident because on the surface Satyendra was an excellent match for Lord Rochant. Only she knew about his allergy to the very crystals that gave the Deathless their power. Only she knew about his other face.

A barking drew her from her reverie. At some point she had wandered into the main courtyard, which was full of strangers and their tents. The various entourages of the visiting Deathless, and those that had come from the settlements to welcome their returned lord, too many to accommodate within the castle itself. Old friends were catching up, gossip and goods were being exchanged, and the air was full with happy noise.

There were many Dogkin tethered here, and their barking was to be expected, but something about this one Dogkin made her stop in her tracks. It sounded excited. It sounded familiar.

‘Glider?’