And, if we travel well, we will become as grace and learn the lesson meant from the journey, not to dismiss error, but to eagerly forgive the err-er, to generously share the balm of mercy and love for, before the eyes of Heaven, we all walk as fools. And the more we exercise our portion of grace, the better we receive it. The abundance of this grace is only limited by ourselves, as we cannot receive that which we are not willing to accept—be it for ourselves or others.

It’s been written that, He who does not forgive is guilty of the greater sin. That verse had always confounded me. I had considered it unjust at best and cruel at worst. But these words were not meant as condemnation—rather as illumination of an eternal truth: that to not extend forgiveness is to burn the bridge that we ourselves must cross.

I have found grace in my walk. I saw it in the joy of Pamela’s freedom, in the hope in Analise’s eyes, and in the forgiving heart of Leszek. I found it in Washington in the wisdom of Ally and the friendship of Nicole, and walking through Idaho in the gratitude of Kailamai. And even now, in my moment of uncertainty and fear, I see it in the presence of Falene. Grace is all around me. It always has been. How could I have been so blind?

I am still in the hospital. My father arrived a few hours after I woke. Tests have been done, and, no doubt, there will be myriad more to come. We do not yet know if my tumor is malignant or benign, and whether or not it has spread. I know only enough to fear. I fear death, as any sane man does, but I’m a creative man so my fears are greater than most.

Still, part of me—a dark or light part I’m not yet certain—hungers for death’s sleep, perhaps to wake in the brightness and warmth of McKale’s arms. This might seem a fool’s hope—to seek love in death—but, truthfully, I do not know where McKale is but death.

I don’t know. Not since I set out from Seattle has my journey been more uncertain. I don’t know if or when I will be walking again. I do not know whether or not I will reach Key West. But this much I know—whether I accept the journey or not, the road will come. The road always comes. The only question any of us can answer, is how we will choose to meet it.

Coming Spring 2013, book 4 of The Walk series

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