And graduate school itself went well, almost easy, really, in comparison to the chaotic juggling act that had been her undergraduate experience. Looking back she felt distant and empathetic to her old self, but also embarrassed. As ridiculous as the whole charade of it all was to her, the glamour had been real. There is something it is like to see yourself on a billboard, or in the September issue of Vogue modeling coats, or tell a group of people at a party that you work as a model. It was a powerful, competitive draw. In graduate school she defended modeling from attacks by her friends who dismissed it as solely misogynistic, objectifying, and unhealthy. But most didn’t even know she once worked in the industry, as she learned to keep it to herself, and spoke of it almost solely with Josh in their insular couple life that took place in small apartments sprinkled over Manhattan.