An hour ago he had switched from coffee to wine. He’s again been wrestling with that first paper, and as a result his Hello Kitty notebook is covered with expunged diagrams, scribbled-over equations, X-ed out experimental designs. All these supposed theories of consciousness are impossible to even hold his mind anymore. They are mere metaphors and illusions, and he can only gesture in disgust at them.

This afternoon Karen, just back from the conference, had called him into her office, and he had gone, shooting a glance at Ben, who sat stiff-backed in his chair looking straight ahead. On entering the office Kierk sat and Karen had adjusted her papers, looking dour and serious and hassled. Before Kierk could speak she began.

“I don’t like adjudicating disputes, Kierk. I’m very busy, I have a lot on my plate, there’s this stupid anonymous review . . .”

“We didn’t—

” “Well, Ben, who has worked for me for over a year now, told me that you told him that he, and I quote, ‘ didn’t exist.’ ”

“Not what I said.”

“You said something similar.”

“I said that the field didn’t exist and therefore he is wasting his time.”

“What does that mean?”

“It’s complicated. But I did not say that he didn’t exist.”

“Did you also tell him that you would, and I quote, ‘break every bone in his hand’?”

“Listen, he grabbed me. I wasn’t expecting it. It was the heat of the moment. I accept responsibility for—”

“You damn better. What makes you think that you can just yell at a research assistant?”

“Look, the guy, I mean, Ben . . . was just mad because I didn’t know his name. He came in looking for a fight because I won’t go to lunch with him.”

“It doesn’t matter, Kierk. It doesn’t. I’ve heard . . . reports from other people, and there’s been some talk among the other Crick Scholars and the professors, that you’ve been . . . disruptive. That you’ve instigated some situations and yelled at people. That you talk down to them and ignore them.”

“That’s exaggerated.”

“But it’s been mentioned to me multiple times, Kierk! And honestly coming from that many sources there is clearly a problem. So I don’t know what to do with you. I really don’t. I mean, you tell me. Tell me what you think the appropriate response is.”

“Free meals at the Prytaneum?”

“What the hell is that?”

“What Socrates suggested his sentence should be for corrupting the youth.”

“I don’t care about Socrates right now, Kierk. I don’t. I need to know whether or not you can function in a healthy, open, work environment.”

“I take full responsibility, Karen. There won’t be any more problems.”

“Just focus on your own research. Ignore what everyone else is doing. You’re a smart young man, just stay out of trouble. Keep your head down. Okay?”