Chapters (16)
She rifles through the pocket of her jeans, now discarded on the floor, and fishes out the bear claw. “Look, I’m not sure about Dan,” she says. “I’m not sure he’s safe. Remember this?”
“Uh—” Anna’s shoulders come up slightly.
“I think Dan broke into my room. I think he put this into my suitcase.”
“Oh, Maeve, no—”
“He’s been following me around. The way he came to the studio, and even the first night—”
“No, I mean—” Anna stops, then flops onto the floor, cross-legged. “I did that.”
There’s a beat, and then Maeve drops to her knees beside her.
“What?”
“I did it. I put it in your bag.” Anna puts her hands together as if in prayer, pleading. “I’m sorry? I mean, yeah, Dan knew—I got him to let me have the master key. That’s why he made that shitty joke tonight. But I had to beg him! You were having those dreams, and I just wanted to see if it would, you know—trigger something for you. An image, something cool. Something I could use? I really didn’t think—”
But Maeve is whirling with relief.
“Holy fuck. I’ve been driving myself crazy.”
“To be honest, I thought—” Anna pauses, trying to find the words. “I guess I thought you’d see the gag right away. Then when you didn’t, I don’t know. I just let it play out?”
Maeve puts her face in her hands, then looks up. She starts to laugh.
“No, it’s fine. It’s good, actually. I built this up into a huge thing. So stupid of me. Like I said, my ex—Iain—” She shakes her head. “I’m just used to things being scary, I guess.”
“I’m so sorry,” Anna says again. “We’ve got to get you used to something better. It was a dumb prank.” She gets up to go, then changes her mind, hovering there. “You’ve been through a lot, huh?”
Maeve moves up onto the bed.
“Iain? I only wish—” She glances away and then back again, meeting Anna’s eye. It’s been a long time since she had a girlfriend like this. “The real truth is I’m just sorry I didn’t kill him myself.”
There’s a silence and Maeve wonders if the admission was a mistake. Too much. But Anna comes close again, perches on the edge of the mattress.
“Just remember,” she says, “you got yourself out. That’s the person you are: you got yourself out.” She stays there a moment longer, then nods to Maeve. “You sure you don’t want me to bunk right in with you?”
Maeve says no. She needs to feel like an adult. She needs to feel at home in her skin.