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Chapters (16)
  1. The Reluctant Assissin
  2. Contents
  3. Books by Eoin Colfer
  4. The Killing Chamber
  5. Gym Girl
  6. Macho-Nerds
  7. Alt-Tek
  8. A Visit to the Outhouse
  9. Victoriana
  10. The Battering Rams
  11. The Red Glove
  12. Golgoth Golgoth
  13. Mr. Charismo
  14. The Old Nichol
  15. Unto Dust
  16. Epilogue

“With respect to the... er... domino effect, why don’t you go back a little early and rescue your father? Now that you have his Timekey and know exactly where he was.”

Agent Smart shook his head. “You didn’t read the entire file, did you, Chevie? Wormholes are a constant length to the nanosecond. Think of them like straws; you move the front and the back moves too. So, if an hour has passed here, then an hour has passed there. This particular wormhole measures just under a hundred and twenty years, so that’s how far we’re going back.”

“How long will you be gone?”

“Not long. Ten minutes, tops. Any more than that and we’re dead, and you’re to shut this thing down, dismantle the pod, and go home to California.”

“Way to think positive, Agent. What are we going to tell the fire brigade this time?”

Smart pulled a full face mask over his head. “Not a problem. I’ve powered up the dampers; no blackouts this trip.”

Chevie surveyed the time squad, clad head to toe in padded black body armor, bristling with blades and bows.

“You guys look futuristic, even with the old hardware. What happens if you get caught before the hemp melts? The boy, Riley, swears there’s some kind of magical killer back there.”

Smart’s voice was muffled by the filter over his mouth. “Ah, yes. The bogeyman. It’s classic transference, Savano. Blame Mr. Nobody. Even if there is some Fagin person back there, I think my boys can handle him.”

Chevie thought so too. These guys looked like they could take down a small country.

“What if there’s an earthquake, and your boys are stuck in the rubble?”

“Well, that’s what the red button is for, though these suits have been in storage for fifteen years, so I hope the mercury switches still work.”

This statement brought the gravity of the situation home.

“Self-destruct?” said Chevie. “You are kidding me? This isn’t an episode of The Twilight Zone.”

Agent Smart’s shoulders jerked as he chuckled. “Yes, it is, Chevie. That’s exactly what it is.”

Chevie did not chuckle; she had a sense of humor, but selfdestruct jokes were not to her taste.

“So I gotta just twiddle my thumbs here while you machonerds are off straightening time dominoes?”

Smart froze. “Macho-nerds? Straightening time dominoes? Do you know something, Agent Savano? I think you have grasped the essence of what’s going on here, and I never really thought you would. Some people’s biggest muscle is in their trigger finger, but you have held it together admirably during this stressful time, and without shooting a single person.”

Chevie stared. Was Smart taking the time to make fun of her? Or was he simply a robot?

“Are you sure you should be heading up this operation? Maybe I should relieve you?”